Your not a serious audiophile I'd you have??????

Let's start a coversation kinda tongue in cheek about this question. Also lets comment on the other way around . Your not a serious audiophile if you don't have ????? I will post my thoughts after several others have posted. Mike
Ok I will start it off. Your not s serious audiophile if your car costs more than your stereo. Mike
Too bad the Audiogon system won't allow corrections to headings be made, ay? :-). My answer is a "sweet spot" listening chair.
desire to listen to new component or wire is BIGGER than desire for sex.
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If you dont have a dedicated audio room !
Your not a serious audiophile if you don't upgrade your system/components every other week...
You’re not a serious audiophile unless you can talk in-depth and with great detail about equipment you’ve never listened to. : )
Your not a serious audiophile unless you have a reel to reel deck and purchase expensive tape recordings out now.
You're not a serious audiophile unless you've kept every single piece of gear, from component, to cables, you've ever had.
You are not a serious audiophile if you have never been to a shrink 
....if you think your system is finally complete, and you will never have to buy another item.

Zmanastronomy, gotta give you my vote! 
Your not a audiophile if your wife or girlfriend tells you to take back the last item you just bought. And your a serious audiophile if you say you are not taking it back

You're not an audiophile if your music collection is not littered with Diana Krall, Jane Monheit, Norah Jones, Pat Barber and Jennifer Warnes.

Alternately, you are not an audiophile if the amount of software you own exceeds the amount of components that you own.

I'll weigh in. You're not a serious audiophile if you aren't positive that that certain piece of extra gear won't extract just a little bit more performance from your system. Kinda like sailing!
You're not a serious audiophile if you truly, really enjoy the music over the performance of your equipment.
If you don't run a grammar and spell checker before posting on a forum (jk)
You are a serious audiophile if you drink the koolaid and believe that a fuse can be worth $125 and make a night and day difference to the system performance!
You have new equipment delivered to your work address or you pick up from shippers so that you can bring in under the cover of darkness, thereby, keeping harmony in the family. 
You have a secret Paypal account that replaces your 401k as a slush fund for your audiophile addictions.
Worries about coming home from a trip and your wife tells you she sold your equipment for what you said you paid for it.
Or that should have read "spouse" instead of wife.  Just thinking about my own situation.
You're a serious audiophile only if, when you see an interesting listing, the first picture you look at is of the back of the component.
Love the posts from tom6897 and rlawry.  

Keep it coming :-)
@sfar, That is so true. I always look at the pic’s from back>> to side/top >>to front. I am usually looking for balanced XLR connections or well spaced speaker terminals :>)    Happy to see that I am not too weird.
Serious audiophiles can get into forum rant 'n raves that can go on endlessly about an esoteric item that drives other 'less serious 'philes' into an immediate lust for said item, regardless of price or appropriateness for Their system....the 'Just Because It Exists and It Might Help Factor'.

Lemmings act like to watch from a safe distance...;)

Keep it rollin', y'all.  Funniest thing I've read here @ AG, and wayyy too close for the comfort of 'some'.

Oh, and y'all haven't even started in on 'speaker size' and comparative anatomy yet...the "taller the line source, the shorter the...." ;)
Your not an audiophile if you don't have an MC phono cartridge and your not a serious audiophile if you don't have at least 2 mounted tonearms!!!!
Your not a serious audiophile if you don't want to blow the dust off your ten year old CD player in the closet that you replaced with a multi thousand one 2 years ago . You don't want to know if the older one was just as good because it just can't be so why should I compare. Waste of time wouldn't you say??
Your not s serious audiophile unless you have a Fozgometer!!!!!
Your not a serious audiophile until you start a thread tittled your not a serious audiophille if you have?????

Sold all your expensive gear and bought powered speakers with built in DAC!
You're not a serious audiophile if you don't run to check your tubes when your baby touches them while they're running hot! Afterwards maybe you check on your baby's fingers...
Funny. Let me try too.
You are not a serious audiophile if you don't keep your cartridge at a constantly monitored precise temperature.
You are not an audiophile at all if you can't hear the difference when you machine clean the same record with different fluids.
You are definitely an audiophile if you still prefer reel to reel deck to anything else.
You are a super audiophile if you always align the cartridge by ear.

If you haven't participated in a "cable matters / no it doesn't" debate

You're not a serious audiophile unless you have taken out a second mortgage on your house to fund an upgrade for your system.

1. If you don't have tubes
2. If you don't adjust VTA per each record
3. If you use original component feet
4. If you don't have at least 20 releases of Abbey Road and Dark Side Of The Moon
5. If you don't clean record before each "critial" listening
6. If you don't hear difference between wire "directions"
7. If you don't have at least 5 sets of different tubes for your equipment to "roll"
8. If you don't have Diana Krall, Cassandra Wilson, Nora Jones or Patricia Barber
9. If you don't have any of TAS, StereoFile or similar magazines on your end-table top inside the listening room.

Unless you have at least three of everything in regular or semi regular rotation at any given time. I suppose having three systems certainly counts for the same.

And I thought of another as I typed on. Unless you are continuously contemplating room acoustic tweaks that can be easily passed off or easily even disguised when sharing a space. 

A members post in my other topic helped inspire the later. "plants make good  defusors", nice grab. I remember reading that somewhere else and forgot to try it before forgetting about it altogether.      
"Posts older than 30 minutes cannot be edited" Oh wise guy, I see how its like. I finally catch one in time then get denied.  
You're not a audiophile if have not sneaked new equipment into your house past your wife, if your wife does not understand the acronym WAF or if your wife's eyes do not glaze over when you try to talk about $120 fuses with her.
Your wifes certainly not an audiophile if she doesn't notice the visible/audible differences between $1000 and $3500 speakers.
You're not serious unless you've been threatened with divorce/forced abstinence/the 'long hard cold stare'/a 'come to Jesus' meeting or variants of the previous...
You'd have max'd out a credit card at least once.  Points for multiple occurrences.  Bankruptcies win the lifetime title...
When 'the remodel' is for a new dedicated listening space ALONE, and not included in a larger plan...
Your dreams play out like a visit to an audio convention...
You wake up twiddling yourself/spouse/both in a non-sexual fashion, but you're excited Anyway...(...this one is Real Serious, and you really need help...)
Your closets have no space for clothes....
You don't like driving in your vehicle because the 'sound is so bad'...after the equipment has been replaced for the nth time....
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Yeah right, your system must be worth more than your wife for you to be considered an audiophile.
If you didn't build your first amplifier when you were 17 and now near 75!!!
The only comment your wife ever makes about your AV system is: "TURN IT DOWN>>>>IT"S TOO LOUD!!!
Every speaker has it's own amp and my wife was yelling TURN IT DOWN IT'S TO LOUD before all separate amps to each speaker
It's the other way around - by playing loud the speakers are telling the wife to shut up.
After you spent a huge amount of money to upgrade your system, you hurried back from work, skipping dinner, turned on your system, put on your. favorite music, and then, lets see... whats new on audiogon today? :)

Your not a serious audiophile if you can't answer "YES" to EVERY comment listed here...


I feel like I'm at an AA meeting, toasting with a frosty keg of  IPA......'So dirty but so good' 

If you have ever listened to live music, you are not a serious audiophile.
You are not serious if you are unwilling to pay your staff $20 each time to intercept UPS before they get to the front door. (Staff was 100 % until $7000 Headtrip headphone amp showed last week.)

You are not serious if you do not recognize "Headtrip" as a quadruple entendre.

You are not serious if your car cost more than your headphone amp.
(Mine didn't :)