A Record Collection/Moral Conundrum - What Would You Do?



Folks,


I’ve been rolling around an issue and I’m simply curious what others would do in my place.


Here’s the situation:


I had an long time great friend and audiophile buddy who I’ll call "John." Around 2009 or so John wanted to open a restaurant. I lent him some money. You already know how this story goes and why we aren’t friends anymore.


But to add some detail, he asked for a heap of money because he was in a fix - said he was expecting a bunch of money (from the government as I remember - showed me some papers about it) but it was going to show up a bit too late, so could I lend him the money just for about a month then he’d pay me back. I explained I was just starting a renovation of a room in my house turning it in to my long-dreamed of home theater, which I’d saved for, and that it would come out of my own savings for that project. I was very hesitant, he begged, promised it was only for a few weeks. I said I could lend him 1/2 of what he was asking (otherwise I couldn’t even pay for the contractors coming).


One of those situations where long time, very good friend who I knew was a good person, who was only ever honest with me, needed help. So I stepped in. That’s always how it goes, right? Yes, I learned the hard lesson about lending money.



Needless to say the money didn’t show up the next month. Or the next. Or the next. Whenever I asked it was another story on how the restaurant was sucking every spare dollar, he’d pay me as soon as he could. Of course the restaurant quickly went under. I was like "I need that money, I have contractors to pay" and he just said he didn’t have any to give. Next he told me he was selling his house, downsizing, and he’d use the funds to pay off his debts including to me. Ok. What else was I going to do?


He asked if he could store his much beloved record collection at my place while he sold his house. Ok. Several boxes full of nice records took up (some valuable) real estate in my basement.


Basically I never heard from him again. Heard he sold his house, but that was it. Other friends have been in occasional contact. I’d been hoping that with his records here maybe he’d show up one day. Of course not.


So...now...11 years later!...I need some money. And I’m cleaning out the basement, wanting those records out of there.


I could sell the records and at least make some money.


The question for the audience is: Do you do it?


The case for selling them seems relatively obvious. He stiffed me for many thousands of dollars that he never paid back. Had me store the records forever while he went AWOL. Clearly has zero intention of ever picking them up.Every arrow points towards "They Are Mine Now."


Except...I have a conscience. He never formally gave them to me.


So, would you try to track "John" down to ask if he wants his records back (and explain otherwise I’m going to sell them)?


Or would you just go ahead, assume ownership (and payback) and sell them?


Floor is yours.



prof
I generally do not lend money to friends. I believe you may only meet one or two true friends in your life...if you're lucky. If I do lend, as I've done only once, I expect to never see that money again and look at it as a loss.

In my case, she paid me back. But 11 years is already too long for something not in writing and already a debt owed.

Still a good story. Thanks for sharing.


You should calculate interest to date and document the loan with accrued interest and total amount due. Then, try to find him through the internet and send him a polite demand letter with a final due date. If you cant find him, place an ad in the classified section of the newspaper in the last known town that you are certain he resided in with a respond by date.

Are the records worth more than what he owes you? If so, you are golden. In either case, sell the records after your respond by date, document the net sales proceeds of the records and keep in your files. Also document if you choose to keep some of the records the approximate value for your files.

All of the above is likely unnecessary and overkill, the steps however would ease your conscience and provide you peace of mind that you did everything the right way.
You shouldn’t have posted about this (here or anywhere), and you shouldn’t have tortured yourself over the moral implications - that just means your dickhead "friend" has now screwed you over TWICE!

In the future, just stop listening as soon as someone pitches a ridiculous "the money will be here in X months" scenario. Tell them to wait X months.

I've lent small money to friends, but never an amount I really cared about, or that in any way would complicate my life with its sustained absence. 
Just ran a WWW search of - abandoned tangible personal property laws Canada - and came up with this link for Alberta.

https://www.alberta.ca/unclaimed-property.aspx

Their law "as I understand" it is (5 years/under $1K value/no need to report).

You might try the same for your area.

DeKay
Also realize to get "top" dollar for those records you’d have to painstakingly list and sell them individually. There’s a HUGE value discrepancy between their sum of median / max values on DiscOgs marketplace versus dumping the whole collection off to a dealer (or collector) for what they offer. There is also a HUGE labor discrepancy in these 2 scenarios. Your time is valuable, and you didn’t "ask" for this job, so the latter (much smaller) value is what you should apply against the debt if you’re gonna do it that way.