Can anyone hear the difference when you add REL subwoofers when playing two channel


I wonder if anyone else has had problems hearing a difference when adding REL subwoofers to their two channel systems?  I have gone back to a reputable dealer in town to listen to a pair of Vienna Acoustic Mozart's paired with a REL S3 and I couldn't detect a difference when they added and subtracted the REL.  I wonder if this was because the Vienna Acoustic Mozart's are already can extend down to 30 Hz.  I have also read reviews on the Mozart's and they said one of their criticisms was they felt the Mozart's to be too boomy in the bass.  

The dealer keeps telling me I am expecting to hear a more punchy pounding bass sound and that is not what I should be listening to.  He keeps saying I should be listening for greater depth and space to create a larger sound stage.  He went on to say if I had a subwoofer that delivered too much bass, they would eventually drive me out of the room and spoil my enjoyment of listening to music.  I thought I had sensitive ears to sound, but in this case I wonder if I am tone deaf.  My fear is getting a pair of T/9i's in my home and my wife telling me I wasted our money because she could not hear a difference. 

There must be a reason why so many dealers have told me their first pick would be a REL because they are so musical.

I also question why REL manufactures their subs with such low wattage?  For example, their S3 delivers only 400 watts and their T/9i's deliver just 300 watts.  When comparing them to  subwoofers like JL, which deliver 750 watts to $1500 watts, maybe REL subwoofers are just too wimpy.
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My RELs were found on Ebay a year or so apart for 200 bucks each in excellent condition working perfectly. Lucky score I admit, (and a few years ago)...still...worth looking around as they show up from time to time, especially the Q108MKII.
Unless you have a large room I would stay away from the lower end REL subs for a 2 channel music system. The S5's on down, I believe all use a downward facing passive radiator which helps the sub achieve lower frequencies and deliver a nice rich fat tone but it can also create definition issues in the low mids and can be . REL's also do not have any phase control, just a polarity switch. Phase control is very useful if you have two or more subs. I would also recommend using a very good crossover but most audiophiles have a very strong aversion to them even though a good crossover with time alignment capabilities can do amazing things for your soundstage.

As far as room placement any reputable sub manufacturer should have placement information on their websites including REL. I would also check out Soundoctor.com for highly detailed information about subwoofers and their placement.
Would any good card carrying audiophile introduce one of these high pass filters into the signal chain if they want to off load some of the heavy lifting of the amp? What I might end up doing if I can't find 2 used Vandy 2wqs (with X-over), is to mimic the Vandersteen method but without paying the Vandersteen prices. (New SUB 3 just too much unfortunately).

Thinking is to get the HSU x-over:
http://hsuresearch.com/products/high-pass-filter.html
And pair it with a Rythmik F12
http://www.rythmikaudio.com/F12.html

Could this sound as good as a SUB 3 or maybe even surpass it?

What are your thoughts?
I have finally made my decision.  After a lot of research, I am going with two F12 Signature Rythmik subwoofers.  The owner I talked to at Rythmik explained the way a REL T/9i is designed.  REL claims this subwoofer  can get down to 28 Hz.  They test their subwoofers at -6 db.  In reality, they are really lucky to get down to 35 Hz.  This is subwoofer territory.  Orchestras get down way lower.  Rythmik on the other hand tests their subwoofers at -3 db.

The owner from Rythmik also said he sells direct because he is not willing to compromise the quality of their drivers and cross overs.  In reality, the cost to build a REL is only about $500.  REL manufactures their subwoofers off shore and they use the lowest bidder to manufacture them.  The difference is Rythmik concentrates on the reverberation of sound and that is why their F12 Signature can get down to a bass extension of 14 Hz.  This does not mean they are boomy.  They are just able to seamlessly create bass extension without the listener detecting the subwoofer has been added to the system.  

I like most of us probably have not heard much about Rythmik because they sell direct and do not advertise.  REL on the other hand advertises extensively.  They can afford to do so because they have a lot more profit margins to be able to afford to do so.

The problem with Rythmik is you either listen to them at audio shows or you have to take a leap of faith to buy them without hearing them.  However, when you talk to Brian at Rythmik, you can tell he understands sound at a much higher level.  I compare him to the knowledge Jim Salk has.  These two individuals are the real McCoy's.  Both develop their speakers to create an extremly flat sound curve.

The bottom line is, if I honestly cannot hear a noticeable difference when a REL sub is plugged in, why bother to spend the money.  I want to be able to hear all the frequencies a recording delivers to a speaker.  I want to it all not just what a speaker is capable of reproducing.  If the T/9 REL can only deliver 35 Hz and the recording delivers a bass extension to 14 Hz, the RELL stops at 35 Hz and the Rythmik can deliver the sound the recording was designed to deliver.  I am glad I didn't make another mistake with my next purchase.  At least I have a 45 day period to decide the Rythmik speakers do what they claim they can do and return them if they don't.  What do I have to lose?  At least this will give me an opportunity to hear how they sound compared to the REL. 

I am sure I will hear some interesting responses.  However, have they heard a Rythmik to compare?

I appreciate everyone's input.  You all are more knowledgeable than me that's for sure and I am grateful to learn from all of you.