the one that got away - how do you handle grief?

My dream speakers were the B&W 801 Matrix from 1991. At that time they were listed for about 15k I believe. I was 24 so they were really out of my budget to say the least. Then years later when I stated getting into / obsessed with gear again I came across them and had to get them. . I was inches away of pulling the plug and btw they were only a few miles from my home to make things even better. Then as looked them over and discussed and with some photos of the speakers with one of my friends I met on here who owned a few pairs of them over the years he told me that they had been modified and definitely not original. I was heartbroken. A few months later another pair came up for sale from Texas btw I’m in NJ. He had them since he bought them brand new. Still mint condition. We talked for a few days about them and shipping. He was incredibly knowledgeable with all of that also. Long story short  I bought them and still have them today and are my main speakers.  Still loving them !!! Things definitely happen for a reason so u just might wind up with a better pair one day !!! 

Acceptance is the key. The faster you can get to acceptance the better off you’ll be.

@tattooedtrackman yes, certainly, patience (not my strength, self-restraint) is important. Especially with a gear older than my first car.... could be risky anyway

Yes. But not to make me whole, just happy.

I recently acquired the MBL 126 used. I wanted exactly this speaker. The ad on USAM was 2 days old. They were in NOLA and  I’m in SoCal and it was local pick up only. MBLs aren’t common on the used market from what I could tell.

I offered to send a private freight company we use at work to pick them up, pallet them at my cost, and the seller agreed.

I got what I wanted within a week. 

You don’t always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, well you just might find, you get what you need.

the one that got away - how do you handle grief?

2 views:

• OPTIMISM - assuming best case scenario is the focus
• REALITY - looking at probability based on history 

So in auctions:

• Optimism hopes the entered bid, at a level I’m comfortable with, will be enough to win the auction. In hindsight, upon an auction loss, when the winning bid is below my max sacrifice budget, then I often beat myself up for not increasing my bid beyond the comfortable amount.
• Reality realizes that based on past observations and experience, I can be outbid anytime (I have no control), even my very best bid. But sometimes I can dive in with last minute bids to help my chances. Nothing is certain.

I used to live in Optimism until I discovered it often leads to DEEP emotional disappointment. Now I live in Reality which spares me the emotional baggage.