LMAO! Great post
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Please don't judge me too severely.
I will always return with beer no matter where I go.
The pub/beer and wine store is on the way to all shopping.
And as alot- actually, all of my friends are at some point or another in the pub, it would be rude not to stop in for a quick pint. Just to say hello. (Getting milk can take 1.5-2 hours.) At least my wife knows I am polite.
I did in fact get up to investigate suspicious noise a very short while ago and stepped on her cat, sleeping on the stairs. I then had a brave wife along side me investigating multiple strange noises, albeit with arms at her waist (is it just me or do our wives remind us of our mothers?)
I can not stay by her side at social gatherings, as her friends are twits- (think single mid 30's who really, really, really, really want husbands- you know what I mean) And, for some reason, I always find the company of strange women attractive. Maybe attractive is the wrong word.
I don't really like going to the movies because she wants to go Friday/Saturday nights. So, my brother in law will almost always come along, and after a pre movie dinner (I'll come clean right now- dinner for me is an appetizer and several drinks) we'll make it to the movie theater wich is across the street. Wich is next to the sports bar above the local hockey rink. We'll meet her and her friend(s) at an arranged time later on. If I am to spend 2-3 hours in the dark,(and pay for it?) I'll sleep.
Pot belly? I'll let you do the math, but it is barely noticeable, and I am a great dresser. Really.
If she asks me if she looks good in her outfit I'll always say yes- she does. Somehow, though, she seems to feel that I answer her before I even look. Really, what changes in hours-days? It's not as though she can morph, right?
Oh, I do enjoy good conversation. It really is one of my favorite things in life. Untill I get the urge to listen to music.......
So, by your rating system, I'm probably at -354,000 or something to that effect.
I believe WAF has long since been irrelevant at least in my case. I mean what about HAF? I routinely have to put up candle parties and such (with above mentioned single females no less) and her "owning" the T.V. (good ridance, she can have it and its evening soaps/reality/home make-over filth.)
Oh, and please- I'll send one of you my personal address so that you can kill me if I ever have to watch "Felicity" even one more time as she owns ALL SEASON EPISODES.
I guess between her T.V. and my two channel, were even!
BigJoe, please take this the right way, I mean it with kindness and knowing that English may be a 2nd language for you: The plural of something is (usually) denoted with an "s". There is no apostrophe (') needed. Therefore, more than one "friend" is spelled "friends", NOT "friend's". Also, verbs do NOT need the apostrophe: wants, needs, asks, etc.
Okay, English class is dismissed . BTW, I got a nice chuckle out of your humor!!