Do posters intend to hurt the feelings of other members?


It is usually the case that members engage in spirited, often passionate, discussions in threads. That’s normal. Regrettably, often those discussions veer off the tracks, where members are offended or genuinely have their feelings hurt by the content of others’ post(s). 

Do posters intend to hurt the feelings of other members? Your thoughts?
128x128celander
Post removed 
Nothing like meanness and disrespect to draw in the members of a website essentially dedicated to music. 

For my part, I wouldn't miss it and don't miss it on other sites where it does not exist.

Not claiming sainthood here either. I'm quick to be snarky and slow to turn the other cheek. Here anyway. On sites where I know it is not part of the site culture I keep it in check much better.

When I found that I was wasting my existence with FaceBook I walked away. Deactivated the account. Will never go back.

I deactivated my Audiogon account recently too. Was gone maybe a month. Got tired of the nasty responses and my nasty responses in return. When asked why I was leaving I wrote "toxic forum environment".

Is it really that bad here? No, not compared to the majority of other places people interact on the internet. But why does an audio site need nastiness to keep us coming back? It is everywhere else. Why come here for more.

Anyway, in an attempt not to be a snowflake I decided to come back, to try to change what I can about ME and how I respond without expecting anyone else to change FOR me.

And to avoid discussions that have nothing to do with music/audio. 

Still a work in progress. C- at this point.


@n80- here's my thinking on that- elevate the discussion on the subjects of interest and ignore the rest. The philosophical discussions tend to get out of hand sometimes, but I guess anything can go astray. I try to contribute where I can, acknowledge my limitations (which are vast) and enjoy the ride. Life's too short, etc. Walking away from the terminal is a healthy thing in my estimation. I've also found that, in many things, my perspective changes over time. Every five years or so when I was working my career- I'd say, "why am I doing this?" I'd go through some soul searching, and eventually recommit with a slightly different view than I had when I was starting, at the age of 24. 
You've been around the block. There is no perfect place where all is good (though Austin is pretty close except in the summer, when we pay for the unicorns and rainbows with relentless heat).
On discourse and what you like or don't--Make it better. That's all you can do-- and others may follow or at least you'll engage with  people of like temperament.  
FWIW, I think you've been an interesting contributor here- you are engaged in music, and are interested in the 'why' of it. That, as you probably know, is what keeps us vital- that inquisitiveness, and willingness to be open to new/different.  End of kumbaya.  I do have fun with this stuff and am always learning, even if it is "re-learning" what I thought I already knew. 
regards,
bill hart
@whart : "On discourse and what you like or don't--Make it better. That's all you can do"

Amen to that.
We are too kind to the equipment... and take out our pent up frustrations with mediocre gear on each other. 
(Kidding... kinda)