Etiquette for a listening session?


'Sup?

Every now and then when my friends have nothing better to do, they'll acquiesce to my standing invite to come over to listen to some tunes on the main system downstairs. Over the years I've learned to choose my invites wisely, based on whether or not the invitee seems to evince any leaning towards or sympathy for audiophilia.

A few times I've been incredibly lucky and chanced upon a friend who doubles as an audiophile and we while away a happy evening and night spinning cd's and lp's and talking about the tracks and artists - and the drinks we have. We do talk, but between tracks or artists, not during. But a few times I've had people over, usually as part of a small group, who insist on talking over the track, much in the same way I constantly annoy my wife by talking during a movie.

The other weekend I invited over a couple, the husband with whom I play in a band; the wife whom I've never met. And while my wife and I and they nursed drinks and listened to tunes, his wife insisted on talking about whatever, bringing up pictures on her phone, and evincing every sign that she had never seriously considered the idea of a listening session to be something worthwhile.

Okay, I get it. It's not for everyone; analogous to if a friend who was into home theater had just gotten a new, hi-end projector had invited me over to watch a movie. Yes, I would have appreciated the clarity, etc. But it's still just a movie, no matter how much resolution there may be on a screen (actually, if there were indeed such a friend, I'd try to get into the video aspect as much as I'd like her or him to enjoy the audio, if only out of respect).

But it's also happened before, like with another (former) band member, another guitarist, who kept talking through the tracks while the rest of us tried (or pretended to try - I can only speak for myself) to listen.

So what's proper etiquette? Do I play the good host and let come what may? Do I lay down ground rules? I know that most people don't actively listen to music, nor appreciate the nuances of a good system, and usually don't care too much, either -- gearheads are gearheads, no matter the passion, and are appreciated only by other gearheads. Just as I remember, in retrospect, a few audiophiles when I was younger who obviously had good systems, but back then I neither knew nor cared about stuff like that, and so was much the same kind of person I'm complaining about now.

But how would you address that kind of behavior or reaction during a listening session?


128x128simao
@marktomaras "the offending conversationalist." Omg...you guys are too much. And then you tell your friend who probably grew tired and bored of your listening session to put his phone in the other room...you have some very understanding friends Mark..
And then we all scratch our heads and wonder why others aren't running to hifi and why the hobby is dying...
I agree with jmcgrogan2, best to real listening alone. Even amongst audiophiles, your system is fine tuned to you and may not be the "be all and end all" for someone else. When I rode a motorcycle, while it was fun to have a girlfriend on board, I could never really open it up and ride like the wind because the way I did it was dangerous and I had to be responsible. I live in a pretty small apartment and when we have guests over I don't spin vinyl, I don't fire up the tube amps, I don't expect people to stop talking. Decent computer speakers creating some pleasant background noise, that's what most folks seem to able to handle. When I have a few hours on my own... :)
I have 20-30 people at my house every other month. Good food, drinks and conversation out side the music room. Everything is perfect and everyone's respectful. 

People come in, grab a record and put it in the listening cue. No one touches the record player except me. 

Civilized. 
Asp307, to my defense, the 2 friends were all about the intense listening session.  Having not been involved in one before, they were curious.  My friend with the phone was just not being a good little zen grasshopper, and I encouraged him that if he would not distract himself, he would enjoy it more.  He did!  But that is a specific situation.  I would not behave that way to anyone anytime.