Why do intelligent people deny audio differences?


In my years of audiophilia I have crossed swords with my brother many times regarding that which is real, and not real, in terms of differeces heard and imagined.
He holds a Masters Degree in Education, self taught himself regarding computers, enough to become the MIS Director for a school system, and early in life actually self taught himself to arrange music, from existing compositions, yet he denys that any differece exists in the 'sound' of cables--to clarify, he denies that anyone can hear a difference in an ABX comparison.
Recently I mentioned that I was considering buying a new Lexicon, when a friend told me about the Exemplar, a tube modified Dennon CD player of the highest repute, video wise, which is arguably one of the finest sounding players around.
When I told him of this, here was his response:
"Happily I have never heard a CD player with "grainy sound" and, you know me, I would never buy anything that I felt might be potentially degraded by or at least made unnecessarily complex and unreliable by adding tubes."

Here is the rub, when cd players frist came out, I owned a store, and was a vinyl devotee, as that's all there was, and he saw digital as the panacea for great change; "It is perfect, it's simply a perfect transfer, ones and zero's there is no margin for error," or words to that effect.
When I heard the first digital, I was appalled by its sterility and what "I" call 'grainy' sound. Think of the difference in cd now versus circa 1984. He, as you can read above resists the notion that this is a possibility.
We are at constant loggerheads as to what is real and imagined, regarding audio, with him on the 'if it hasn't been measured, there's no difference', side of the equation.
Of course I exaggerate, but just the other day he said, and this is virtually a quote, "Amplifiers above about a thousand dollars don't have ANY qualitative sound differences." Of course at the time I had Halcro sitting in my living room and was properly offended and indignant.
Sibling rivalry? That is the obvious here, but this really 'rubs my rhubarb', as Jack Nicholson said in Batman.
Unless I am delusional, there are gargantual differences, good and bad, in audio gear. Yet he steadfastly sticks to his 'touch it, taste it, feel it' dogma.
Am I losing it or is he just hard headed, (more than me)?
What, other than, "I only buy it for myself," is the answer to people like this? (OR maybe US, me and you other audio sickies out there who spend thousands on minute differences?
Let's hear both sides, and let the mud slinging begin!
lrsky
Sounds to me like your brother is trying to get in your head and has done a pretty good job. There's nothing wrong with either of your approaches to audio -- to each his own. His works for him and yours works for you. You can't force someone to see through your eyes or hear through your ears and it shouldn't matter if someone else doesn't hear what you hear -- or else you'll end up on an audio site writing to yourself. More like Jack Nicholson in The Shining. The proper response to your brother, as well as his proper response to you is something along the lines of, "oh, you!" With a bemused shake of the head.
Post removed 
Rsbeck

Well said and my thoughts exactly. As larsky and I have traded e-mails discussing the pros and cons of Thiel speakers. People hear what they hear and it really doesn't matter what their opinion is as long as you enjoy it. If we listen to music and are concerned what other people hear then we are listening for the wrong reasons.

I too was a skeptic of cables and power cords making any difference. But I kept an open mind and have since proven myself wrong. And now believe there is truly a difference albeit maybe not in all systems.

As for CD players of yesteryear compared to players available today. I have played around a little bit with different players and have never heard as much of a difference as I thought I should have. My old Philips CD-80, vintage 1990, still sounded damm good when I sold it, even compared to players of today.

Lrsky, just relax and enjoy the music and forget what your brother thinks. I believe most of us who frequent this site are on your side. As to why do intelligent people deny audio differences. I don't think in general they do. Maybe your brother does because he is either close minded or simply doesn't hear it or both. I consider my self fairly well educated with a BSME and MBA from a major Big 10 school. And as mentioned above do believe differences exist. I am also sure others do as well or this site wouldn't exist.

By the way I am looking forward to that speaker trial; you are not backing out are you.

Chuck
Before I get blasted on this I'd like to clear the air with everyone knowing I have an education degree in industrial arts. Having attended teachers college and interacting with many educators through the years there is a tendency among the rank and file to talk down to adults as well as the children they teach. They are acustomed to shaping minds and yours is no exception. I have teachers that are my friends but in general I bristle at the attitude your brother displays. I'd suggest simply never talking about audio. You are not going to change his mindset and you hear what you hear. This is one reason I decided not to teach officially. And yes, there probably is some sibling rivalry going on here. Get this out of your head.