Glad you liked the photo, Pat.
Feel well, buddy.
Howard
Feel well, buddy.
Howard
About Lugnut -- Patrick Malone
Many of us have come to know Patrick Malone (Lugnut) as a friendly, helpful, knowledgeable and kind individual. He is a frequent and enthusiastic contributor to our analog discussion forum. He has initiated only 17 threads, but responded to 559 threads. I would guess that many, if not most, of us can recall a time when Pat replied with helpful advice to a question we posted or helped us track down a rare recording. I have come to love Pat as a friend, and to respect him as a man, and I suspect many of you share those feelings.
Today I write to share difficult news with you. Pat has been diagnosed with an aggressive stomach cancer. It has yet to be determined whether surgery will even be worth it. If surgery is performed, most or all of the stomach will be removed, and Pat would face a difficult and long post-op period in the hospital. The medical course is still uncertain, but will be determined soon. Whatever is decided, it will not be easy or pleasant.
Something may be planned in the future to assist the family. For now, Pat could use some of the friendship he so often and willingly showed us. You can email Pat at: [email protected]. You can also mail cards, letters ... or whatever. You may email me for Pat's mailing address. My email is: [email protected].
I hope to spend a few days with Pat in Idaho or Nebraska (from which he hails) soon. Between this news, my legal work, getting ready for family arriving for the holidays, Audio Intelligent, and trying to make plans to visit Pat, my head is spinning. If you email me and I don't respond, please understand that I am not ignoring you, but rather simply do not have time to reply.
Pat may or may not have time to respond to posts here, to emails, or to cards mailed to him. But he has asked me to convey to each and every one of you that he has cherished your friendship, your comradery, and sharing our common hobby on this great website.
As we prepare for our holiday season celebrations, and look forward to -- as we should -- enjoying this time of year, I ask that you keep Pat and his family in mind ... and softly offer up, in quiet moments in the still of night and early morning, prayers for Pat and his family. God bless.
Warmest regards to all,
Paul Frumkin
Today I write to share difficult news with you. Pat has been diagnosed with an aggressive stomach cancer. It has yet to be determined whether surgery will even be worth it. If surgery is performed, most or all of the stomach will be removed, and Pat would face a difficult and long post-op period in the hospital. The medical course is still uncertain, but will be determined soon. Whatever is decided, it will not be easy or pleasant.
Something may be planned in the future to assist the family. For now, Pat could use some of the friendship he so often and willingly showed us. You can email Pat at: [email protected]. You can also mail cards, letters ... or whatever. You may email me for Pat's mailing address. My email is: [email protected].
I hope to spend a few days with Pat in Idaho or Nebraska (from which he hails) soon. Between this news, my legal work, getting ready for family arriving for the holidays, Audio Intelligent, and trying to make plans to visit Pat, my head is spinning. If you email me and I don't respond, please understand that I am not ignoring you, but rather simply do not have time to reply.
Pat may or may not have time to respond to posts here, to emails, or to cards mailed to him. But he has asked me to convey to each and every one of you that he has cherished your friendship, your comradery, and sharing our common hobby on this great website.
As we prepare for our holiday season celebrations, and look forward to -- as we should -- enjoying this time of year, I ask that you keep Pat and his family in mind ... and softly offer up, in quiet moments in the still of night and early morning, prayers for Pat and his family. God bless.
Warmest regards to all,
Paul Frumkin
1,087 responses Add your response
Welcome back, Pat. Glad to hear you beat that nasty infection and are now feeling better. Yeah ... have Steve help you get everything set up ... lay back in that recliner ... apply some enhancer ... and spin some vinyl. Now ain't that livin' large? Here's hoping you feel stronger and better with every passing day. Warmest regards, Paul |
Welcome back Pat! Good to hear from you, I do hope your condition will continue to improve. I'll be very interested in your impressions on Greendale, that is high on my list for new vinyl purchases. Although to be honest, I haven't had as much time to listen to the harvest I reaped at Christmas. I must have been good, because I got about 2 dozen new LP's for Christmas. I have listened to them all at least once, but I just never seem to get as much listening time as I'd like. I need to get a dedicated listening room, that will help. My boys are getting older, so it shouldn't be too much longer until I can steal one of their bedrooms and convert it to my own private domain. Anyway, here's to better health, quality tunes and great friends I say (raising my mug). Cheers, John |
Pat, now that you got the tabacky back in your pipe, how 'bout we start solving them world problems?! First off, who's gonna be the first to open a high-fi store and bring Audiogon to downtown Bagdhad? How about Sunni Sound? Hussein's Hi-Fi? Salah Al-Din Yussif Ibn Ayub Audio & Video? Ahmed & Khalid's Stereo? |
Steve came over today and we set up my new stand and the amp stands. They look good and I'm proud to say the stage depth improved. We inserted the Supratek and the system sounds wonderful. We'll be mixing in various new pieces for quite some time to find the best synergy. Steve is a good, faithful and dear friend who is fearless in the face of my enemy. God bless him. Paul checks up on me all the time. There must be an especially nice little corner in Heaven for guys like Paul. I've known him my whole life or so it seems. John, the Greendale set is worth buying to hear Neil play some blues licks. I'm guesing that one of my life long pals will be bringing over the DVD which I hope makes understanding the story more fun. The set is pretty pricey but it's recorded really well on the best of vinyl. All the other stuff that comes with it is cool. All the art work is Neil's and there is a bunch, a bumper sticker, a 7" record I don't have a clue about and some other stuff I've forgotten. Buying it depends on big of a fan you are but I'm guessing it's a low production number which makes it a good investment. Dean, world events and politics don't seem to have a lot of meaning EXCEPT my heart is warmed by the possibility of a self governing Iraqi people. The next ten years is going to be a challenge for them and I wish them the best from the bottom of my heart. To this end everyone should be on the same page but alas....GWB will enjoy an especially nasty place in the history books over the real issues of illegal invasion of our country, exporting of jobs, importing of cheap labor, outsourcing industry and sucking up the wicked empire. To be fair he is just continuing what was begun around the time of Richard Nixon. Lugnut has spoken. Baghdad will enjoy huge prosperity and high end audio will be there in no time if....It's gonna have to be an Ali, Ahmed or the like that'll open it up as I don't expect there will be any foreigners dumb enough to do it. Unless they get the power to stay on for awhile the high end market may be comprised of systems like Tom Lyons complete with batteries. No doubt their systems will be analog with all the raw materials they have. |
I should have kept my mouth shut about politics. He he. Honestly though, my vantage point has changed a great deal. I find it very frustrating during this time to even contemplate all the various events that are shaping the future, a future I will not have to endure. I'm saddened because I want so much more for my fellow man than what the current crop of leaders world wide seem to have planned. All of you that are young enough to live well into the future are going to be faced with challenges the likes I don't even want to utter. What we need is a benevolent king but all I see are self serving dubiously elected officials world wide that are hell bent on morphing the elected into a royal class for the future. Curiously, at the core is a common theme, again world wide, to drive the masses into a life of common peasants. When I connect these dots I see a grand scheme where Satan is alive and well and this makes me closer yet to the one, true benevolent king. Sorry if this is a turn off for the unbelievers and I promise to not mention politics again in this or any other thread. Understand though, that God has touched me in many ways during this time with not so gentle reminders that he is alive and well also. This thread is proof that He took extreme measures in my case to send a message. Many of the posters, gift givers, readers and private coresponders with me since this started will know exactly what I mean. That is why I earlier mentioned that what is going on here needs to be shared as widely as possible after all of this has played out. This is not about audio. This is not about the "stuff" given. This is about how we should be living and interacting all the time. If noone picks up on this and writes about the real meaning then please allow this experience to be burned into your memory so that you can share this throughout your life when the need arrises. Lugnut as preacher is finished preaching and I sinerely hope I haven't offended. On the brighter side I eagerly await the two most anticipated packages yet, the Ridge Street cables and the Starsound products. This is stuff old Lugnut has only been able to dream about owning. Steve Dobbins was over yesterday and we inserted the Syrah into my system. This isn't the first time we discovered the transformation this wonderful preamp does to my system. It is a jaw dropper of the first magnitude. Beyond belief. I've used Steve's Ridge Street cables before and the improvement is very significant and well worth the cost of admission. I wish that the speaker cables that were coming were two pairs so that I could use my current speakers to best advantage but if someone knows of a good adaptor for the banana's that Linn uses to spades I'll get a set and use the RS cables on the high frequency side of my current set up. I'll let Steve (hopefully) chime in on how wonderful this rig sounds. I trust his ears and have deep respect for the system he keeps putting together! ROTFLMAO. I've learned a great deal from Steve and I've really corrupted him. He's shown me how very close great digital can come to good analog and the impact cables can have IF you have a system that allows the differences to really be heard. The Syrah allowed that to happen. LOL, me corrupting him because he now looks for releases on vinyl before searching for the SACD or CD equivalent. When I was a kid mothers used to tell their sons to stay away from my influence and this is proof! Unfortunately, the Syrah has developed a problem and we had to remove it from the mix. You technical types: please read this and post an opinion in the hope that the thing can avoid going back to Australia for repair!!! When the preamp is cold it sounds wonderful and my cartridge is happy with the standard, recommended loading of 47k. As a side note all troubleshooting reading are correct when cold also. After about 45 minutes into listening the sound very quickly becomes strained similar to inserting a very low powered, cheesy amp. Nothing sounds right. It's congested, with little detail. The bass is pretty much gone. It sounds horrible. Now, if we change the loading to 10 Ohms the sound is much improved although all magic is gone and many of the negative qualities remain. We're thinking that maybe there is a solder joint or even a tube socket that is failing at an elevated temp. Unfortunately, readings have never been taken when warm and this would be the first thing to do. Tubes are not the problem as I've spent considerable time with every tube that is recommended in the "preamp deal of the century" thread and the problem remains. Any ideas on this would be most welcome. This piece is central to making the most out of what gear remains after playing with all the new stuff you great guys have sent my way. Any idea why the edit my post option is no longer available? I found that out yesterday with my last post. |
Hi Everyone, first I want to say that I belong to many clubs and the audio people are, BY FAR, the most down to earth, genuine people I know. Of course there are exceptions to every rule and you know who you are, LOL. Seriously, you guys have made a hugh impact on Pat & Barb, and I mean that in the best of ways. Thank you very much. Pat's sound room just came alive yesterday when we inserted the Supratek. When the stylus dropped on the Pro-Use version of "Take The A Train" you had to listen. You could not talk, read or even think about anything else but the music. The bass grabbed you by short hairs and would not let go. The dynamics just made us shake our heads. This modest stereo would embarress several much more exspensive systems I have heard. At least for about thirty minutes. I would enjoy giving you my opinions on the Mid-East situation but I don't have the time right now...maybe later if I get enough requests. Steve |
Pat / Steve, . I don't have the answer to the Syrah problem, but you might want to copy and paste Pat's question on the long Supratek thread: http://forum.audiogon.com/cgi-bin/fr.pl?aamps&1016931418&openmine&Cello&4&5&st0 It is quite long so you will need to go to the bottom of the thread and page forward to get to the bottom. . You can also copy and paste the same question and send to Mick at Supratek ([email protected]) and see what he has to say (if you have not tried this already). . Pat, It is great to hear you rambling away and in such good spirits. I am glad to hear that your system is sounding so good. Let us know what happens when you drop the Ridge Street and Starsound products into the mix. . Steve, you are a great friend and Pat is quite luck to have you. . Best Regards, Larry . |
Good to hear you in good spirits, Pat! Keep on spinnin'. :-) As aside, if you want to go to the end of a multi-page thread, just click on the >> "button" at the right side of the page (just to the right of the last page number visible). Larry's right, someone will HAVE to have the answer amongst all those Supratek fans. |
I've decided to forgo chemotherapy. This is a selfish move on my part and one that I'm very comfortable with. I know deep down in my heart that by doing so I will have more quality days of what remains than by enduring the torture of the drugs. I'm not giving up and this is not courageous. It's is a pragmatic decision and nothing more. You guys have been an inspiration to me and continue to lift me up each and every day. I plan on a busy day today as I'm feeling pretty darn good. Steve's coming over and we are taking steps to deal with the Syrah as he wants it in my system and, man oh man, I do too. It's a magical piece when it's right. I've also got to sort through all the other stuff and hopefully land on the best mix of components and then deal with the clutter. The room Steve remodeled for me demands that I do so and my mind will feel much better by getting organized. Don't hesitate to respond about the news I've dropped in your laps. I'll look forward to reading the posts. |
Lugnut; I know you had to weigh a lot of things when deciding whether to forego further chemotherapy. I've always felt that in hi-fi weighing quality vs. quantity, quality always wins. I would agree it applies to life as well. We're all looking forward to your impressions as your system continues to evolve and bring you some awesome sound! You're in my thoughts and prayers bro'. |
Pat, You make the best decision for you at the time, and never look back. I agree that the quality of life is much more important than the quantity. I watched my father eventually lose his battle with cancer, while the rest of my family complained that they didn't think he fought hard enough, I cannot say that I ever blamed the man. He had survived bone cancer surgery 25 years earlier and 2 heart attacks. I felt if he had tired of the quality of his life, he'd more than earned the right to decide to make a quicker, more comfortable transition. May God bless you Pat, and may your decision work out for the best. I'll keep you and your family in my prayers. Now enjoy the good tunes, great friends and wonderful family. John |
Hello Pat, We have never spoken but after reading though this thread...I feel as if I have got to know you and your wonderful wife. I would also like to thank you for the great pictures... The ability to place a face with a screen name makes me really feel like I know you. I'll bet you have at least one person in every corner of the world praying for you... Well you certainly have one in Canada The best to you and yours...and remember The present is called the present because it is a gift God bless Carlo |
AAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGG!!!!! I filled the sink with hair this morning. LOL. Now I'll be able to go incognito. I guess it doesn't matter and the goatee will grow back quick enough. But old Lugnut isn't going to be able to shock and annoy his friends with his unusual appearance. The time warp is history. Hell, I guess in a month or so I'll just need to take to wearing white shirts and ties to go along with this new look. I will not however be posting a photo of this new look. Assuming I make it to Miami in early march I'll be able to hug guys like Cello and Doug Deacon with them thinking some insane stranger has crashed the party. Woohoo! I've been swapping gear in and out of my system like crazy. A couple of things that will most definitely stay no matter what else comes or goes are the Ridge Street cables. Robert, you are a magician! They haven't settled in yet but with the addition of the tuner, thanks to Jeff Logan, I'll be able to play some low level radio to speed up the break-in procedure and enjoy this weekend at a new level of detail. The additional detail in the bass and high frequencies is something else, really. I've used his cables before and know exactly what to expect once they settle in. The best way I can convey the huge impact they have is by saying it's like going from a very inexpensive mm cartridge to a SOTA mc. Everything is better without any harshness whatsoever especially considering I'm running solid state amps. It's a shame that the RS speaker cables can't be used with my current system as I'm sure I'd be in hog heaven then. If anyone knows of a banana adaptor that has a binding post on it I'd love to try these driving my mid/bass drivers and then the tweeters. I'm guessing that this alone would represent a significant improvement. The little Snells are incredible performers even though I had to place them on top of my floor standers which wasn't giving them a fair chance to really shine. I have yet to receive the stands that go with them but when I do I'll go through the setup again. There was a small amount of bass driver pumping caused by the rear firing ports interacting with my turntable and placement of the subwoofer is going to be problematic with my room layout. Still, even considering these massive setup problems, if they exceed the performance of my floor standers I'll figure out a way to use them. For sure, they would work very well if I were digitally based. I do have an idea for using them in another system in the living room if I can do it on the cheap. Man, I'm going to miss my old retro look. Let's have a moment of silence for my hair. |
Oh well. Hair today, gone tomorrow. While you deny it, I do think your decision to forego the chemo is a brave decision, as well as a wise one. As we discussed, 150 good days is better than 300 bad ones, and that first course of chemo certainly caused you some very bad days. And I doubt that it's totally a selfish decision; I'm sure that your suffering from the chemo wasn't easy on Barbara or Amanda ... or for anyone else that cares about you -- just ask Steve, or me, or any of us. Those Snell K7 Monitors are amazing, aren't they? They image-up beautifully, with very liquid and gorgeous mids and highs. They provide a great deal of detail while also remaining very musical. They were designed by Joseph D'Appolito, the inventor of the famous D'Appolito array (tweeter flanked by 2 mids), which has been copied by almost every speaker manufacturer. BTW, I just called Snell, and the stands are on their way! I wonder if, besides moving the location of the table, removing the dust cover or perhaps letting it rest on a couple small pieces of Sorbothane might reduce the port turbulence problem. I suspect Tom Lyons' Audiopoints will help a great deal, and allow you to successfully integrate all of the components in your listening room. And if not, give Snell's Bob Graffy a call -- he's a very knowledgeable guy and a very nice man to boot. Their website is www.snellacoustics.com. I also agree with you about Robert's Schult's Ridge Street Audio cables -- they're great, and he's a great guy, too. As Steve mentioned earlier, audiophiles are a wonderful group of people, and this clearly extends to manufacturers who are in it for the love of it. This hobby has been called a sickness, a mania, an obsessive-compulsive disorder, and other (fairly accurate) terms. The beauty part is, we get to "suffer" with the best company! :-) Have a great day, Paul |
Pat, I support your decision to forego chemo. I have a hard time believing in its merits, all told...this hippie will stay off his soapbox otherwise! ;) I've recently added Ridge Street Poiema!! speaker cables in my system and I'm quite pleased with them so far! The Northeast Wisconsin Audiophiles had Robert and Steve up to Green Bay last month to demo the RS cables and new speakers. Great guys and great products! Hey Pat, if you're bored and looking for something to read, check out The Detox Book second ed. by Bruce Fife, N.D. Maybe you find it helpful or interesting, maybe not, but it's a worthwhile read IMHO! Feel better, man! |
Hey guys, I got a haircut yesterday and it doesn't look like I've lost as much as I did. Boy oh boy do I look respectable. I'm seriously thinking about getting lightning bolts dyed into my hair on each side. Bright red perhaps. Barb wants me to get my ear re-pierced. I'd do that if I could find a musical note earring. Know where I can get one? As a few of you guys know, old Lugnut grew up in a less than sophisticated environment and never got exposed to classical music. I've always felt that I was missing out on a lot of joy but without a mentor it was too daunting a task to undertake what with all the great jazz and blues I could pursue easily. Well, I've got myself a mentor now in the form of Scott Campbell. The first of his records that I listened to was Tchaikovsky Symphon NO. 6, a MOFI pressing. While not the best recording the content lifted Barb and I up and carried us away. Very sensual and intimate if that is a correct way to express how it made me feel. Thanks Scott for making this easy for me. Later guys as I've got a busy weekend going. |
Barb and I had a really great day yesterday. I finished removing the clutter from the music room to do justice (and to make me feel good) to Steve's remodel job. I'll be posting my system soon as I'm now not ashamed at the way the room looks. I do think there will be a lot of editing for several weeks as stuff gets swapped in and out. One of my oldest and dearest friends I grew up with in Nebraska (Gretna, if you're interested) also lives nearby and his sister came for a very short visit. They have a good friend in similar circumstances to myself living here. She and her husband took the time to stop by and visit. It's been over 30 years since the last time I saw her and it was if we had remained close this whole time. The visit was much too short but very enjoyable. A member of our local audio group invited his wife and himself over for a visit and to listen to some music. His system is comprised of an Audio Aero Capitole, Levinson preamp, huge Krell amp and Wilson Watt Puppy 7's. His wife has some of the better ears in the club being able to fetter out the good versus the bad in very short order. The woman is uncanny in her ability to discern lasting positive differences quickly versus the differences that don't endure after an extended period. She was absolutely blown away by the black background and total lack of surface noise of my analog front end. He is trying to determine what turntable to buy (a re-convert) after listening to Steve and my systems previously. Back to the story. Several times he remarked how great my system sounded and said that while his Wilson's did some things better than my Keilidh's my system was so very, very enjoyable. He even went so far as to say, referencing another club members +/- $100K system, that there was very little difference between the sound in my room and this other room that had been featured in one of the AV magazines. They were impressed with the room on several levels. First, it was apparent to them that the dimensions are very favorable for sound, a fact that I've learned to appreciate and be thankful for. I was lucky on this one. I knew the room would be ideal for this hobby when we bought this house but didn't have a clue about how important basic room deminsions are. Second, they both remarked at how comfortable the atmosphere is. Steve has incredible taste when it comes to design and hit a home run here. Having been around the block with this club I can tell you that getting sincere compliments like this don't happen unless they are real. The Ridge Street interconnects I've been breaking in this week have just made everything gel. There is no hint of glare, the increase in macro and micro detail is staggering, the sound stage is much more stable with increased layering. I can tell that I do need to move my speakers a small amount to maximize their disappearing act. It's funny that with my old interconnects doing this or that minor change didn't seem to make much difference. Now it's clearly for the better or for the worse. Another club member is struggling with my situation and is kind of speechless and uncomfortable, not wanting to say the wrong thing. He's got a good heart but words seem to elude him. I wish he would just lighten up and go easy on himself and stop worrying about it. He sent a piece of vinyl as a gift and I've got to say this was a real discovery. It's a fairly light weight piece of vinyl pressed in Germany of Rikki Lee Jones most famous album. I've owned it on MFSL but parted with my copy a couple of years ago to an AudiogoN member that just couldn't seem to locate an affordable copy. I've missed the MOFI copy I parted with and haven't been able to acquire a domestic pressing that was quiet enough. This German pressing is dead quiet and I'd put it up against the MFSL pressing in every regard. It's that good. I've also never seen this pressing before. There is a circular sticker on the album jacket that is yellow with a big black exclaimation mark in the center. This was a great gift. You football fans, please don't get angry with me but I'm having an anti-Super Bowl listening session today with a couple of friends. I do want to see the half time show and hopefully will see some of the better commercials as well. Once again I'd like to thank Jeff Logan for the tuner. Barb and I tuned in KBSU, our local NPR station, and were blown away by the sound quality. Gene Harris lived in Boise and his wife hosts a two hour jazz show every Saturday evening and her taste in jazz is superb. I just didn't realize how much I would enjoy a tuner even with the lack of quality programming here. As a simple tool to break in IC's and cables it's cool also. Thanks Jeff. |
Awwww Pat, and anti-Super Bowl party? Coincidentally, I'm having the biggest one ever. As I have three sons ages 14-20 and our hometown Eagles have finally made the big game!! For the first time in my childrens lives!! E-A-G-L-E-S EAGLES!!!! I'm headed out now to pick up more supplies. Enjoy the tunes. |
Hi, Patrick: Thanks for the nice acknowledgement, and I'm glad you are enjoying the classical LP's I sent. There's more where the first batch came from, so let me know when you're ready for the next installment. I hope you have received the book on classical music that I ordered from Amazon for you ("The Essential Canon of Classical Music") -- it will give you a lot of interesting, non-technical information that will add to your enjoyment of the music. In response to the question above: yes, I'm the guy who sometimes sells LP's -- some of our A-gon members have bought LP's from my collection. I may be ready to do some more "winnowing" of the collection sometime soon, and I'll post an announcement on A-gon when I have the list ready. Best to all, Scott Campbell |
I don't own any pastel colored clothes guys. I don't know of anyone in real life that has any clothes like that to borrow either. Hell, I've never seen them for sale in stores. About all we get to choose from around here are a few different colored jeans and camo everything. Joe, yeah I think I'll be going but you know, I can't be 100% sure since things have a habit of happening. I do want to go very much. |
I've been invited to a members home to listen to some tonearm/cartridge comparisons with some other guys and maybe catch some rays in the process. I might not want to come home until May or so. ;) Dean, I've found a pastel t-shirt. Think that would work? I might even have some pastel socks but did Sonny ever wear socks? |
Patrick: I haven't encountered this thread before today, and didn't have time to read through it all just now. But you and I had some enjoyable correspondences in the past when I was more active around here, and I've always highly regarded your thread contributions. You just kind of know who you'd personally like and respect on Audiogon were you to meet them in the flesh (which I hardly ever do, since I don't go to shows or join clubs, etc.), and I certainly count you as one of those guys. I've endured too many losses due to cancer in my as-yet fairly young life to indulge in much cheery well-wishing. Tomorrow, my brother and I will rendezvous on the opposite coast to visit with a cousin who grew up as a virtual twin brother of our late father's (the two of them even shared the same names); at 80, he has what is now metastatic colon cancer and is on his second course of intensified chemo in under a year. We wanted to see him while he's still in relatively good shape and spirits, and have a lot planned over four days, including attending a talk this cousin will give to a civic group concerning his WWII experiences helping to liberate a Nazi death camp. Within a month after we leave, he and his wife have a 2-week trip planned to Italy in between doses. My cousin knows medicine and death - he was chief of anesthesiology for one of the country's largest metropolitan hospitals, while his first wife died of lung cancer - and though he is committed to fight his disease, he has made it clear that he does not want any treatment that overly diminishes his ability to live fully in the time he has left. I look forward to spending some of it with him; he's the closest thing to a parent I have left. When my brother got married the year before last, his bride's father was slowly dying from kidney failure resulting from advanced cancer. With continued treatment at that time, he could have lived several more months or longer, but didn't feel well enough under the grueling regimen to attend their wedding. I didn't know this man - I met him for the first and only time at the gathering. He had discontinued treatment and dialysis expressly so he could travel to make the event. He had to lie down during the ceremony, but seemed very happy just to be there, with his family all around him. He died two weeks afterward. It's a very tough call. My own mother worked, ironically enough, for the National Cancer Institute, so that when she got agressive ovarian cancer in her late fifties, all the most cutting-edge protocols were tried on her over an increasingly brutal 18-month period before she died. The whole situation left me feeling she was more of an experimental guinea pig than a nurtured patient. It had been her regular gynecologist who had initially found her disease; when she operated on it, she blanched and began crying, telling my mother there was no hope from what she had found. My mom was furious at her for her unprofessional reaction and ended their relationship, but it turned out this doctor and former friend had been more correct in her impression than the parade of well-intentioned truthsellers that followed. I was close by to my mother for all of that time, and to this day I couldn't tell you if the kindled and dashed hopes, let alone her extended physical torment, could ever have been worth it compared with possibly taking a different, probably shorter but more certain and maybe humane approach. However, she was also reacting in a way to the death of her mother (my grandmother), who when she got breast cancer for the second time after many years having been cured, broke my mom's scientific heart by blithely ignoring her expertly-researched advice and doctor-shopping until she found one who told her she didn't need any treatment and could live comfortably until she would have died from old age anyway, whereupon she soon became sick (and unfortunately demented - it must have gotten to her brain) and died within a year - needlessly, so her daughter was sure. What proved to be my mom's fatal diagnosis came only two months after my grandmother's passing; my father was always positive the two things had a causal link. As for myself - not being as generally optimistic by nature as my dad was or as steadfast as my mom - witnessing my sister-in-law's father's choice cast my grandma's actions in somewhat of a new light. On the other hand (leaving out several more instances on the first hand, I'm sorry to say), a daughter of the cousin I'm about to go visit has survived, taught school, danced flamenco, and raised a beautiful family while fighting cancer in four separate bouts over probably two decades, and we'll be seeing her on our trip as well. And my girlfriend's sister recently survived a virtual terminal diagnosis for inoperable cervical cancer the size of a grapefruit - on top of which she contracted chronic hepatitis while in the hospital - but she's in amazingly good health today. (Her hair grew back curly, just like my mom's did at one point.) So to you I simply say, whatever you do, do it well my friend. I'll look for you around here whenever I can, and one day I'll make good on that threatened return and peregrinate all the way from the bottom to the top of Idaho state (or what's left of it after W. and Jeb get through :-) and maybe stop by, or if not then think of you sometime. Peace Love & Light, Alex. |
Alex, The stories you tell about your personal experiences with cancer are heart breaking and, sorry to say, all too common. As I have said before I am one of the lucky ones. I was diagnosed in 1988 with mixed cell nodular lymphoma. I didn't respond to the traditional West Coast therapies so I was placed on a very aggressive regimine as practiced on the East Coast. This type of lymphoma is considered 100% non-cureable. I've lived until now without any evidence of a return only to get this shit. This last Wednesday we met with my oncologist to establish a course of treatment. I had decided that no further treatment was the best course of action since I had reacted so severely to the first round of chemo. There is another drug that's usually reserved for people with a fighting chance for cure. It requires you to be hooked up to a pump for 21 days and then one week off. The side effects are minimal and the drug is a good one for slowing the progression of the disease. The pharmaceutical company that had developed this drug has now developed an oral dosage of the same compounds. That was offered to me on Wednesday. It was an exciting prospect since it would only require me to take 8 pills, 4 twice a day. So, here's the problem. The iv drugs are covered almost 100% by my insurance but the oral meds are covered under our standard prescription plan. Since there is no generic equivalent we pay 80% out of pocket meaning that the per dose cost would be close to $50 per pill. For the mathematically challenged, that's $400 per day for 14 days and then one week off or $5600 every three weeks. That's not an option for us and I wish I didn't even know about it. I continue to work on my system and can say in no uncertain terms that the Audio Points made a substantial difference when used with my speakers. Imaging has become more stable and the stage is layered more than before. Interestingly, it seems to get better each time I listen and I guess that this is a function of breaking them in. I'm using Audio Points under my two amplifiers and am also using the Ridge Street interconnects from the preamp to each amp. The interconnects have made the biggest difference in my system with an increase in detail, transparency and smoothness in presentation. I'm now using the Ridge Street speaker cables to the tweeters on my speakers and a pair of basic transparent wires on the mid/bass drivers. I think I need some break-in time with these but will say more detail than ever is getting through. I'll let you know what I think after a week or so of burn in. I'm sure I'm approaching the maximum potential of my system. Steve (Vetterone) has found a piece of vinyl that is really special. So special that I consider it to be the finest recording I've ever heard. When I listened to it on his system last week I was simply blown away. Finally, a piece of software that set his wonderful system free. I've urged him to write a review of it now that I've got my own copy coming my way. I'm guessing that it will be one of those records that will demand big money on the used market as I think it will be a limited production piece. I can't speak intelligently of the recording techniques used since it was in a language other than English but I believe it is a direct to disk recording. If only all software was this good. Sad to report that the Syrah did not get fixed. But get this, Steve has purchased another one for me to use. It should be here soon. What a guy!! You gotta love him. |
Pat, it's alot of fun getting to break-in and tune-up a whole new system, isn't it? Hey, that Steve is a great guy to get another Syrah for you, like he did. Paul and Doug did a great service with their spearheading the system donation efforts. All the donators are wonderful for their generous actions too. In fact, I think everybody that has done anything, posted on these threads, or did any praying or well wishing, is a heck of a guy, and I'm proud to be associated with people who'll come together for a buddy in tough times. |
Tom, you said a mouthful with that last paragraph. I'm so proud of this community. Hopefully this isn't really about me but rather about our shared humanity. Even the folks that are simply readers of this thread are special. Sorry to all for not giving you updates for awhile. I sometimes wonder how much information you all want or need. I did have my drain tube removed also. Now that I don't have any mechanical devices protruding from me I feel more normal in spite of what I have now termed my "Frankenstomach". This extensive modification should be reserved for hotrods or older tube gear, not to the human body. My insurance company has denied coverage for the pills since they consider their use to be in the investigational phase. It's being appealed by my doctor, bless his heart. But, I do know this, no matter the outcome he will still want to "fix" the unfixable and I constantly struggle with how to handle him. He's a caring and kind soul and that is what I want on my side through this. But, what I consider to be unnecessary, heroric measures that would most likely be to my detriment, he considers standard protocol. He's indicated in my diagnosis that I'm depressed and I'm pretty sure he'd like to give me meds for that too. Give me a break. Of course, I'm unhappy and maybe I am depressed for being in the box I find myself in but this is normal. I'd be depressed if my cat was suffering. My job is to deal with this because failing to do so would bring more anguish than I can imagine a human enduring. Besides, and I think this group would agree with me, I think I'm doing a pretty good job of getting a handle on it. You guys, as well as my traditional friends and family, have validated my existence for the last 54 years and I thank you. As many of you may have noticed I'm back to posting in my traditional fashion. My "wordly" emotions are coming through loud and clear which is an indication that I'm feeling much better. Hey, it's not like I'm normal as I define it but I did go out and play pool again last night, kicked ass, eyeballed the tight jeans and thoroughly enjoyed myself. I slept better last night than I have in several weeks. We have a big day planned for this Sunday with a few of my friends from our audio group. Listening to a SOTA viny rig at one house, moving onto audition new MBL speakers at another and finally dinner at a third members home. This is living large guys. And, next week is the Miami gig. If I can improve on how I now feel this will be more fun than being a blind folded judge at a titty contest. |
As many of you may have noticed I'm back to posting in my traditional fashion. My "wordly" emotions are coming through loud and clear which is an indication that I'm feeling much better.I did notice that Pat, and was very happy to see it. Thanks for the update. Your kindly doctor is wrong about the depression I think. Nobody as loud and opinionated as you or me could be depressed. Say, why not invite that insurance company exec out for an evening of pool? You could probably sandbag him for enough to cover the pills! He'd never admit he was taken to the cleaners by Frankenstomach! <:^) Oh, leave the blindfold home when you come to Miami. I'll feel safer. See ya' soon! |
