I have Dynaudio x12s and love them. No hardness on top, and I'd describe the midrange as on the warm side of neutral. (What HiFi rated the x12s more highly than the x16s; you might want to look at the reviews, but my sense was that it had to do with competition in the different price ranges. Although I suppose that since the x16s go lower, they might not be as well-integrated as the x12s--one of the x12s strengths, IME.) I've never heard the SF Concerto Domus, but have heard good things about them.
I had a VTL ST-85 power amp for a few years, & used it in roughly a 10x10 office room with fairly efficient speakers. It only had so much power, & pretty much "crapped out" in a larger room, or with less efficient speakers, but it had it's tube-y charms.
As far as: "an occasional hardness in the treble(at louder levels)and wouldn't mind a little more warmth in the midrange", if VTL gear isn't giving you enough warmth (!?), I'd look for a diff. brand of speakers, like Merlins perhaps.
Or go to a SS amp, & stick w/Dynaudio's.....just my 2cents.
The first choice should be to dump the girl friend. The 'trio', her, son and dog have proven you must give up music. The Trio will not give you any other choice. Hey, it happens. Sad.
Agree with Steveaudio. The Dyns will crave Solid State, so if keeping the amp, I would look elsewhere for speakers. The Sonus Fabers are a COMPLETELY different direction - warm to a fault perhaps, boardring on rolled-off. Their Classic series is spectacular, while I find the Domus to be just "nice". I might suggest Harbeth P3ESR or Avalon NP Evolution Series, or somthing French and very efficient (Focal, Triangle, JMR, etc.).
I missed that you have a tube amp and agree with the comments above about Dynaudio and solid state. You'd probably do better with more efficient speakers. Knownothing made some great suggestions. If you want to try a tiny and affordable option, I drove Silverline Minuets with a 12 wpc tripath amp with excellent results, and the reviews suggest that they're great with tubes.
You probably know this already and have accepted it, but Buconero117 brings up something to consider in your speaker choice.
First, you are going to be moving your system into a smaller room. If it's because of your relationship, is that okay from your perspective?
You've only got so much money, so who is going to pay for a six year old or dog breaking your things? After you replace these, what about the next time, and then the time after that? You could be pouring a lot of money that doesn't have to be spent into replacing your system, not upgrading it if you want.
Why would a six year old, who's old enough to be given boundaries on what's acceptable and what's not, be allowed to break your things? How's the rules and discipline situation?
As Buconero117 hinted, your girlfreind may be telling you through actions that your stereo has no place in her eyes. If that's the case, how do you feel about that?
And if that's the case and you accept that, maybe you should sell it and use the money for what she wants.
My first wife could never understand or get past the fact that I had my stereo to help unwind. It wasn't that I loved my stereo more than her, it's that I loved me as much as I loved her, and the stereo was a part of me. I've played music as well as listened to it all of my life.
I'm chuckling a bit after reading Buconero117's & Krell_man's comments. I lived thru (barely) a similar situation with a g/f & & psycho, peeing, very mean cat. (And I'm a cat lover, I have one sitting on my lap right now, purring). I felt like my house, & "stuff" were under assault.
Besides all the cat damage, Quickly it got to the point where I couldn't even listen to music, on either of my 2 systems, w/o getting grief for it.
I'm leaving out all the worst details, but what Krell_man said: "Why would a six year old, who's old enough to be given boundaries on what's acceptable and what's not, be allowed to break your things? How's the rules and discipline situation?", I think nails it. Any normal rules, behavior, were out the window, as long as I put up with it.
Here's the kicker: guess who's the bad person in that situation? It's the one who doesn't want their house & stuff destroyed, or constant chaos. You can watch one of those dog training programs to get an idea. There's always one adult who insists on enabling the destructive behavior....
Personally Dyns are best with strong, powerful s/s amp.
That hardness is due to the amp loosing steam at higher volume levels be it solid state or tube, it can have that character.
If you like the dyns sound, you might want to look at a more powerful amp.
If you like to use your VTLs, you might investigate other speakers like the harbeths or sonus fabers.
Buconero, Krell_man, Steveaudio,
Okay, Freediver's taking this a little too casually for me too. But lets not be too hard on the lad. Perhaps she has merely provided him with the excuse he's been waiting for to upgrade all along, and is now making it up to him in ways that...well, you know.