Why Does All Jazz Sound The Same?

Squeaky squeak squeak, honk honk honk, ratta tap tap, bing bang bong, tinkle tinkle, rumble bum bum.  

God I love it!
Just my opinion , but I don't think it all sounds the same. What I consider to be traditional Jazz sounds nothing like what I consider to be modern Jazz. Neither sound like fusion. Your definition of modern, traditional, or fusion will probably influence your opinion.
Good question. Why does all food taste the same? Answer that and you've found the answer to the question about jazz.
So does all rock, classical, etc to you?  Perhaps it's the style of Jazz your listening to?
If all I heard was squeaks honks bangs and tinkles I’d love it as much as you do. 
Must be a substandard setup if your music sounds the same. Change cables,fuses and adjust speaker position.
You just defined so called experimental Jazz, which to me is really awful. It is like a bunch of people jamming, but not jamming the same song. 

More classical Jazz, Blues-Jazz, smooth-Jazz, etc. is nothing like this. 

This is Jazz you may like :   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OiyNy5irPYY
OP-- it's unclear whether we ought to take your post seriously or regard it as an attempt at humor... or is this ambiguity precisely what you intend? 

I'm not sure what you're listening to. Listen to the following small sample.

Piano,  Theloneus Monk vs Oscar Peterson.
Guitar,  Wes Montgomery vs Jim Hall.
Trumpet,   Clfford Brown vs Chet Baker. 
Alto saxophone,  Paul Desmond vs Charlie Parker. 

If you're unable t distinguish differences between these iconic jazz musicians playing the same instrument then something's wrong.
I think you guys are taking his post way too seriously. @snackeyp was having us on..........
Post removed 
Why does all women sound the same ?

Squeaky squeak squeak, honk honk honk, ratta tap tap, bing bang bong, tinkle tinkle, rumble bum bum.  

And we love it
it would be too confusing if it sounded different, then we couldn't be sure it really is jazz...
Sorry guys.  Was making a joke!  I love jazz more than any other music.  I used to think it all sounded the same but once it clicked it became my favorite form of music.  
I feel like a troll for this.  Should have added sarcasm quotes or something!
Yeah, I know.  I was mocking my coworker who always says that jazz all sounds the same.  I should have explained that but I wasn't very much awake yet when I had that thought.  
I told him he should try listening to the Grateful Dead (who I love BTW).  A lot of people say that all Dead music sounds the same.
@snackeyp What you are hearing is related to musical training. Classically trained musicians know where the right notes are and get them on the first try, while Jazz musicians go by trial and error. Jazz bass or guitar player "walks" all over the fretboard until he finds the right note. That makes all Jazz sound very alike, no matter who plays.
I don't know if your comment is tongue in cheek or not. If your serious see my post above. Those musicians sound nothing alike playing the same songs. Very different approaches and improvisations. Probably you are posting in the same spirit of @snackeyp. 
Hi @kijanki, 
Got It!😂. 
Honestly it's hard to tell sometimes when communication is limited to text and in addition  knowing that in reality  'some' would actually feel /believe that in regard to jazz.
Maybe you need to turn the repeat function off on your cd transport and quobuz home page.
Squeaky squeak squeak, honk honk honk, ratta tap tap, bing bang bong, tinkle tinkle, rumble bum bum.  

God I love it!

I know you say you love it, and you are probably being a bit facetious, but for the uninitiated, it should be pointed out, that there are vast differences in many varieties of jazz. 

None of the following subgenres of jazz sound anything like each other:

Post-bop (Coltrane, Miles, Freddie, Evans, McCoy, etc)
Fusion (Return to Forever, Mahavishnu Orchestra, Allan Holdsworth, Alex Machacek, etc) 
Chamber jazz (Oregon, Terje Rypdal, Jarrett, Eberhard Weber, Jan Garbarek, etc)
Avant-garde (Cecil Taylor, Anthony Braxton, Ayler, Art Ensemble of Chicago, etc)
Jazz-metal (Panzerballett, Counter-World Experience, Spaced Out, etc)
M-Base (Steve Coleman, Andrew Milne, Greg Osby, Cassandra Wilson, etc)

Just to mention a few...
I'm very new to jazz but I'm enjoying it, unfortunately the misses is NOT. Her opinion on jazz is and I quote "it sounds like 4 people playing 4 different songs on 4 different instruments all at the same time" 
Your wife is not alone with those sentiments. Jazz and classical music will never be mainstream for the general population and I accept that. Pop,Rock, Hip hop,Rap is what millions gravitate toward and where mega amount of money is generated.

I actually feel lucky/fortunate to be one of the  "relative minority" of people who simply love and deeply appreciate the outstanding music that the jazz genre offers. Given its small niche in the music universe it’s amazing the vast amount of recordings (And quality) available.
+1 @charlesdad

i was so fortunate that in college my first roommate was a burgeoning jazz saxophonist there on scholarship... over the course of the schoolyear taught me how to listen to and appreciate jazz... started with chuck mangione, herbie mann, earl klugh, jazz crusaders in the fall, and by springtime, i had learned to ’get’ bird, coltrane, monk, mingus, roland kirk et al

talk about life changing... have been in love with the artistry, energy, creativity of jazz ever since - the gift that never stops giving 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
the gift that never stops giving 🙏🙏🙏🙏

So on the mark. Thanks for sharing your experience,  lucky you to have such a roommate. 

A very good friend of mine is  a drummer and his brother is  a pianist.  Both are accomplished jazz musicians on our local scene. It was incredibly helpful in my development when I'd listen to them practice and attend their weekend shows. Talk about training one's ear with all of that frequent up close exposure to live instruments. 
I agree, Jazz is really growing on me. It's perfect as background music because it's rarely annoying and I'm finding more and more that I like. I'm very "young" in Jazz so I don't know all the great go-to's but for now I'm liking the normals I guess: Bob James, Dave Grusin, and a few others I can't pronounce.  
Once upon a time, I thought all bourbon tasted the same. Once upon a time, I  thought all rock guitar riffs sounded the same.  Once upon a time, I thought country music sounded the same. 

It seems the more I listen to different types of music, the easier it is to appreciate all types of music.
Of course it all sound's the same ... they all play the same twelve notes ... 🙄
There are many branches and styles within jazz.  It is beautiful, often soulfull music.  Many of the greatest popular artists are influenced by jazz - Steely Dan, Joni Mitchell, Anita Baker, just to name a few.  It is a wonderful original art form from America, that now has broad followings around the world.
Personally I love all Jazz, Blues, Rock, Country, Reggae, Classical, Indie, Punk and yes even some Rap.

Like what you like and do not put others down for their choices or proclivities.