To all you drummers out there

Please advise. Getting electronic drum set - obvioulsy acoustic is better but this is to keep wife happy. Set is to indulge me in my increasingly senility and 8 year old daughter who has become a drum fanatic. Lessons start next month. Of course I will rent with option to buy - so choice is very important ...if I buy then I want something to compete with acoustic and that will last perhaps 10 years (i.e no poor quality that will frustrate quickly - bear in mind I really prefer the sound/feel of acoustic drums but am forced to go electronic). Playing along to music files and no tuning issues will also be a key reason to go electronic.

Roland has been highly recommended - specifically TD9. Should I get all MESH toms or is mesh for the snare enough? That is my conundrum. I don't care for the feel of rubber and I am told the mesh is even quieter and more realistic...but it adds significant expense obviously.

So drummers out there - feel free to chime in! Any other tips for a person who typically wants to upgrade each year and who wants to make sure they get something good enough to kill that urge for at least five years.