Totem Arro's are about as good as I can think of in all of those regards.
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On the affordable end of the spectrum, I have to second the Meadowlarks (in my case: Swallows + Swan). Biggest "free pass" I've ever gotten in audio, my wife is overjoyed at the wood construction + the appearance. I'm overjoyed at the sensitivity + the sound.
My wife only really likes the La Scalas in the living room when the cat tries to climb in them, because that's just damn funny.
I second the vote for Sonus Faber. I find the Cremonas beautiful and sonically great. If you are willing to look at a bookshelf, in a smaller room the Cremona Auditors are killer for the price and look great with their custom stands. In the right finish the JM Labs Electra 926 or Diva Utopia are very attractive. In sizable measure I own the 926's just as much because my wife finds them attractive as because I like the way they sound.
Cain and Cain's, all of them are absolutely beautiful. Also, I don't like the speakers but MartinLogan's look great. I have a solution as well. I have had Magnepan 1.6qr's and now 3.6R's, and my wife loves the sound hates the look. But, they are so flat and not too heavy, that I can disconnect and slide them behind a decorative screen. Check out my system there is a picture with the 1.6qr's out, then one with everything put away.
This is the first time I see people recommend Merlin for WAF. Any wifes that I know, including mine, thought Merlin is about as plain and ugly as it gets. No offense, but Merlin is a black box with no style of any kind. Especially if you put Merlin right next to Wilson Benesch, Sonus Faber, Chario, or Diapason, I don't think any wifes will notice Merlin at all and probably assume Merlin is a speaker stand :)
A few of my favorites
Wilson Benesch ACT's
Merlin's: though Black ice blue is the best
The Cain & Cain Abbey is a very nice loudspeaker, but you'll have to take care in amplifier matching. Terry Cain's woodwork is exquisite. Somewhat limited in bass extension and maximum output level, but very coherent. The Abbeys would probably benefit in the bass department from close proximity to room boundaries. http://www.cain-cain.com/abby/index.html
Eben makes a nice line of slim speakers that in my opinion are exceptionally coherent for multi-ways. Lower efficiency than the Abbeys, but they extend farther at the frequency extremes. Very high quality drive units. Their ribbon tweeter is perhaps the best I have heard of its type. When I heard them they were positioned only about a foot or so out from the wall. http://www.eben.dk/eben/index.htm
I don't sell either one of these, but like 'em both.
How about these. Electrostats, 1" wide, 6" tall. Look good in a living room, in an art deco sort of way. Good WAF, I know, I tried them with mine (wife, that is). Active, so no need for extra boxes (amps) cluttering the room.
You might want to look at the Vienna Acoustics Schonberg. It's only 3.5 inches deep, is made of brushed aluminum, and was designed for near wall placement. It received a great writeup in HiFi Plus a little while ago. It's starkly modern looking, so you'll probably either love it or hate it. Other beautiful loudspeakers that come to mind are from Opera, Sonus Faber, and Vienna Acoustics (non-aluminum line), but most will probably suffer from near wall placement.
Sorry about your luck with the 3.6's, Eric. Somehow, I got my wife to accept them, visually. Now that she has been listening to them for a while, I think she is hooked, too!
I have a friend whose wife is all about the looks, though, and I helped him pick out a system using Totem Arros and Dreamcatcher centers and surrounds, and she is all smiles. The best part is, so is he!