RIP Dad Elgordo

Well it has been a year today since my dad Donald Laby passed away and it hasn’t gotten any easier for me or my family.

My father was the greatest man I have ever known. He always knew how to say the right things when I had problems. He taught me to be an honest, loving, good person, and to always do what I think is right, no matter what the cost.

He was into High Fidelity Stereo and taught me the balance of sound. He was always turning me on to good music and helped me in my quest to become a better musician. I have had many great experiences with music from violin to cello to voice to guitar, tenor banjo, keys and mandolin. I could not have done any of it without his support.

My dad was also a wonderful grandfather to my niece and nephew always opening their eyes to different possibilities, showing them photography and playing them songs on the stereo. He helped with their homework and kissed boo boos. I’ll never forget how he would look at them just imaging their own possibilities.

He showed me the ropes of life to the fullest extent and I know he is learning the ropes of the after life so when I’m done here, he can be by my side once again to help with the next process.

I can’t say how important it is to tell the people closest to you how much you love them.
Just do it. Tell everyone you care about just how much they mean to you and how your life is better because they are a part of it!
My heart goes out to you. I know the loss is devastating. I lost my first born and only son less than six months ago. He waw 24 days short of his 23rd birthday.
You and your family will be in my thoughts.


I never knew that Elgordo had passed away, I remember him well from the forums. Please accept my belated condolences on your loss. It must have been a real treat to have a father that shared your passion for audio, a shared interest like that between generations is increasingly rare. It would seem that the lessons you learned from him continue to serve you well, and that is the best kind of legacy of all. You should be very proud.
I'm sorry for your great loss, Mandocarrie. What a great tribute you've made to him here, and a touching reminder of what is important in life. I lost my father last May. I had the great fortune to be by his side for the last three weeks of his life, and to hold his hand and speak to him in the moment of his passing. I've often reflected upon just how much I am like him, and the tremendous gift he has bestowed upon me in that respect. Part of the legacy he's passed on to me is the love for art and for music. I would not be writing here today, were it not for his and my mother's infleuence.

I will not diffuse further the lovely sentiments you've shared about your father, with any more of those of mine for my own. Instead I'd like to thank you for yet another chance to reflect upon them in a renewed light. Your father sounds like a remarkable man, and I'm sure would be proud of your tribute to him, and that he's raised such a generous person who would share these sentiments and feelings so openly. The loss of my father is certainly is the most difficult thing I've faced in my lifetime, and time has not made it much easier, as one might think. It is the kind of loss that stays with you always. In reflecting on him like this, I take some comfort in knowing that he is with me always. I still stay up nights thinking about him.

I will also echo your heartfelt advice; do not let these days go by, this fragile and short lifetime we have here, without reaching out daily to those you love. There is no greater gift in this life than love, and the people around us we share it with.

Elgordo was one of the more fun Audiogoners. Know that he was both liked and respected greatly. It's heartening to know he lived his life to the fullest.

We all mourn your loss, Mandocarrie. You must be incredibly proud to be his son.

I'm very sorry to hear about the loss of your father. I buried my dad earlier this year, and understand your sorrow. It been almost a year for me, and yesterday a stray thought of him brought tears to my eyes.

I'm sorry too, that it took this long for any of us to be able to offer our condolences. Sometimes people just disappear from AudiogoN, and in most cases the community never finds out why they are gone. Seeing your dads user name brought a smile.

While I am sorry at the loss, I'm also thankful that you shared this with us.

What has been expressed here exceeds anything I can add. I will only say I had great respect for Elgordo and thank you for allowing us to share your memories.
I echo all of the thoughts above, and will add just one other. Although one year has not been enough time to heal the emptiness, it will come. My wife lost her father suddenly at an early age. He was a great guy and everyone loved him and missed him. He and my wife were very close. The first year or two after his death were difficult for all of us; but especially for her. It has now been almost 30 years; we all still miss him and mourn the fact that he never met our son, or that we never had the chance to share our more recent prosperity with him. However, the pain of the loss has diminished; replaced more with sorrow for not being able to share the things we know he would have loved. So it really is true that time does heal. It takes different amounts of time for all of us and when you are ready, you will begin to remember the great things he gaave you, with a team AND a smile.

We share your loss and admire your courage for putting your emotions out there for us all to see.
It's never easy to dealing with a lose, be it your own or that of someone elses. When its "your time" to go through, it seems that no matter how hard it is to cope from day to day, oddly enough, its the memories of the years previous you spent with the loved one that keep you going.

I know your pain all too well. Only consolation I have is time and a lot of prayer. Time heals and GOD hears. It may not seem like much right now, but it works if you allow it.

I haven't been on the gon for long so I haven't had the pleasure to correspond or debate with your father. What I do know is that it would make him proud for you continue on.

You and your family is truly in our thoughts and prayers.
I don't know you from Adam, but I know where you are; I've been there before. If you ever need someone to just listen, in all sincerity, shoot me an email!

I too didn't realize Elgordo was no longer among us, probably because I don't participate myself as much as I used to back when I saw his name with regularity on Audiogon. There are other missing names from earlier days about whom I sometimes wonder where they've gone. I don't think I ever had any direct correspondence with your father Mandocarrie, but I definitely recall having a positive impression of him from the forums. I'm going to go back and search on his name to reread some of his contributions so I can get to know him better. You and many of us are certainly not alone in having our fathers to thank for our interest in music and audio, and in feeling that absence keenly now that they are gone. Thank you, for another reminder that we need to stop and thank them, every day.
Mandocarrie, my sincerest belated condolences to you and your family. I have much respect for Elgordo, he was a well respected member of our community.

I know it is an overstated saying, and it probably won't help at a time like this, but time really does help heal the scars. My father left me on October 25, 1987. Do I still miss him, absolutely. However, I do find as I get wrapped up in life, work, family, my children, friends, etc, the pain has subsided. Believe it or not, you will eventually move on with your life, as I'm sure he would want.
I smile more now when I think of my dad. I wish he were still here, but now when I have thoughts of him it brings smiles, not tears. Maybe it's beacuse I only remember the fun times, I'm not sure.

Anyway, thank you again for sharing and caring about our lives. Live well and make your father proud.