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I found out that the quietest refrigerator is that one that's not in the room. I bought a new one recently after starting a crazy thread on the subject, only to realize that you regular $600 fridge is just as noisy now and they used to be 20 years ago, sad but true. Had to move it to the next room, needless to say, I have no wife to speak of...
May not be the best alternative, but you can probably just turn the fridge off when you are listening to music. It will not hurt to have it off for a few hours, as long as you are not continually opening the fridge door while it is off. I have had my fridge down a number of times for as long as 6 hours due to a power black out and there were no harmful effects to the fridge or the food inside.
Just got a kitchenaid architect series refridgerator last week, as far as the noise you can defintley hear it. Although it only comes on for a few minutes every couple of hours so nothing too bad. Also there is a vacation mode which I would imagine runs the motor even less than when in normal use. Good luck with your choice.