How do you get the "real" feel of music?

Indiana & Bomarc above probably offer your only hope here. You want *dynamics* Beetle - that's what you're missing now, but don't despair because you can get that too. It will take some experimentation, but you can approach the dynamics of live music with the right speakers. Yes you can feel the music at my house, bathe in it, become involved in it, revel in it, not simply hear it.
My primary "secret" to live dynamics is horn speakers (Klipsch's horns) vs. the direct-radiator designs that have failed you. There are some other older horn offerings that also offer high sensitivity/efficiency, such as the old Altec's, JBL's & or perhaps even Cerwin Vega. Avantgarde has some fantastic new horn designs but they're pretty expensive even at used prices.
Some audiophiles advise against horns because of their shortcomings, yes they do have some horn coloration sound (that just takes awhile to get used to & then you hardly notice it) but the transient attack speed and dynamic impact more than make up for it. And looking at other affordable speaker designs (such as those you mentioned above) they all exhibit some shortcomings & compromise tradeoffs, so this charactaristic of horn speakers becomes just another of those; it's no big deal. Also, you can install some basic tweaks in your horns to fix the resonance issues, so again no big deal. I even have high-end crossovers modded for mine.
Try to get out to a shop that sells Klipsch & hear some of their newer designs. They're not as sensitive as the older classic LaScala's, Belle's, or K-horns, or even the Heresy, but have still been recommended by members here with higher end equipment. If you can find any way to audition the older classic Klipsch designs then you'll probably buy one.
Be advised that these horns, being so sensitive & revealing, will show you any shortcomings of your upline equipment. The balancing act is tricky, but when you eventually arrive at the right combination of equipment & cabling, you'll be thrilled I guarantee.

Hi Zaik your points are well taken & are nicely explained. My rec's however were also meant to be taken within the context of Beetle's existing equipment - he's using "affordable" hardware vs. the 'pricier' equipment that you suggest, which may be beyond Beetle's reach at the moment.
"I'm not rich, and I don't want to hear, 'Scrap all your sorry equipment and get a...'"

Great suggestions Joe: I forgot about the Tannoys especially & I do like them! But B&W's no way - extremely inefficient. Flat response yes, nonresonant yes, accurate yes, but slam & dynamics - no.

Beetle a dynamic range expander is just another 'fix' (like Eq) that you'd be better off without, keeping the signal path cleaner & simpler; 2 fewer pairs of cabling for the signal to go thru as well, not to mention their extra cost. But if you want to try one I'll 'loan' you mine; it's been out of my rack for years now. It's a Phase Linear model 1000; shoot me an email if interested. I used to use it for fixing up bad tapes when I did some vocal-cassette "production-master" dubbing jobs.
Regarding your bright room-response; yes you've pretty much figured out the reasons why - too many reflections. Wall rugs, floor rugs or carpet, stuffed furniture, window treatments, those basic sort of things can help a whole lot.
Yes you want greater dynamic range; speaker replacement will go a long way to getting you there. Cabling synergy & some other tweaks will also help, but I'll not get into that right now as you really need to address the basics first.
Your speaker budget mandates used equipment to get much of anything decent, but hey that's OK. Many of the above suggestions are certainly worth exploring.