Get out your thinkin' caps....

Ok, this may not fit here, but what the hey?

The fellow who cut my hair yesterday is making it a habit of asking each customer for the most creative ideas for exacting retribution on Bin Laden. So far, it would be a many day event, during which (of course) the meal plan would consist solely of pork products. First, you strap him down on an operating table and run a full blood transfusion with a couple of the Hasidim. Then there were a bunch of intermediate steps that didn't catch my attention enough to stick in the old noggin, but which, by necessity and in anticipation of the final coup de grace, must include a fairly aggressive set of hormone treatments in said pork products. Finally, you return dear old Osama to the operating table and deck him out with the absolute best sex change operation money can buy. And with that, he gets to return to Afghanistan a "free" woman.

The question? Let's fill out the intermediate steps. Now, we don't want anything horrific or gorey -- no stringing up by entrails or the like -- be creative and subtle(ish). Yes, we eventually want to hijack the women of Afghanistan and send them all to college, but I think we should let Osam(ette) have a chance to explore her new sexuality at home for a bit before we do that. Have at.

Finally, in the name of pursuing our other common interest, don't bother with those little "Magic Coasters" that claim to be perfect for speakers while allowing you to slide them around to your hearts content. Tried'em on a whim and, while they slid like mad, they absolutely tore the bottom end out of my Thiels. What more, it was a genuine ordeal pealing those little stick bits off in the aftermath. Alas.
........a total body shave should be included as an "intermediate" step. And of course something involving pigs, boars, hogs, swine, sows etc. Liberal use of duct tape may be in order. OBL seems to think that he has "won" something, but it's him that is living like a @#$%^@#$%$&$#@ cockroach in a cave. CHEERS. Craig
Put him in the ring with Mike Tyson. Tyson could pound him some, then bite off an ear. Pound him some more then land a few low blows. You get the idea.
Good ideas from both so far. Rhn1m, I'm not sure the low blows would do much damage. Let's face it, the guy has no b***s.

How about we take him to the local strip bar and stuff him full of baby back ribs and lager? :~) Doug
Well, you guys are paying too much attention to his so called tenets, as though he were a man of faith, and possibly offending the sensibilities of some devout Muslims.

Just shave him and put him in your average maximum security prison.
Paul, you are correct, sir. Just think of him being another inmate's honey for the next 40 years. I'm sure the gaurds would be wonderful matchmakers.
This is a guy that lives in caves with a bunch of other guys. I think he'd enjoy prison!

Encase him in Lucite and hang him by his beard from the Brooklyn bridge. Where are the so called "phychics"?
Just think what finding this vermin would do for your infomercials!
Lock him up in the same cell with Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson and Jerry Farwell.
Put him in a cell with the Teddy K and a hidden web cam.
yeah, get out your thinking caps, will ya?
why is America better than any other country...because while the whole world fought and harbored ill feelings, this country minded it's own business went about life happily...smiling at the person next door...everyone envies the orderliness...the politeness...the peace of mind of America...don't you know that....civilisation is a lot more than tons of money and tall buildings...
why on earth would you want savages to influence the way you think...that's their stratergy: they bring you down to their level and prove it that they are better at being savages....
we have a kick-ass army that'll take care of us...the only way we keep America ahead is by being responsible nice...forget hatred, prejudice...and it may not be that hard to improve on perfection
sorry if I dont sound patriotic...but disturbing our peace of mind is probably the most efficient instrument of terrorism....
be nice...and listen to good music...