Do you have a "Music" Friend?


I don't mean a friend who you B.S. about audio equipment with, but someone that will sit down and do some 'serious' listening with you. You and they pick an artist or specific album or two (varied genres even), and just sit and listen. Basically someone who knows when to just shut up and just listen to the music? I've had a few friends like that in the past, but not one of my current friends know how to just sit and listen for even 20 minutes. It's always background music or just one favorite  song they like. My wife for instance lasts about 1 song before bringing up something she saw at HomeGoods. Is this a lost concept or am I just not hanging out with the right people? 

128x128deadhead1000
Nope.
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But one night a few years ago my entire extended family sat through 90 mins of Roger Waters In The Flesh DVD on a 90" screen and were blown away.
I sure do. One of my best friends for decades has the same bug I do. We always go to Axpona together as well. To top it off we have the same musical tastes. Makes it a lot of fun! Bourbon always finds a way to join us as well.
Not in 40+ years. When me and my friends were in our early twenties, we would spend entire evenings playing records, but by the mid 1970's I was burned out with my buddies' perennial fixation with hippie rock blues.  I'd put on Lou Reed, David Bowie or Gustav Mahler and all I'd see were grimaces. 
@EDCYN687 Regardless of my nickname, I was and am open to all music. Yep, been about 35-40 years for me too. I had one friend who loved the Doors and Springsteen, I myself never put them on, but had no issue with sitting and listening. Lou is/was great, Mahler is in my top five of classical.
@arch2 - I am jealous.
I am fortunate that I have 3 music friends that enjoy listening to music for hours. They each have slightly different tastes which is great. The only problem is none of them live close so overnight stays are usually the norm which is fine. I would love to have additional music friends but I get the feeling that people today have too many distractions and to sit down and listen to music for a few hours is just not how they would like to spend their time. Nobody however has a problem watching a concert or movie on my system which I find interesting. 
2 of my cousins will hang w me til wee hours of the morning just listening to music. Should hang w them more. 
 My old friend (Asit) rip my friend. Would have a couple drams of 21, 25, or 30 year scotch from time to time, sharing music at each other’s house. God, I miss my friend, you took him away too early. 
 Every time I play one of his albums he is there in the room with me. “Should you ignore, and forget your old friends, then they are truly dead” 
much like my Father, friend, Aunt’s & uncle’s .....
my cousin told me this after the passing of my aunt. It has been in my mind since.  
  “One never gets over the passing of a cherished loved one, we simply learn to live with it”
    Great words!!

 Music on my friends!

This is a marvelous thread that's brought out sincere and thoughtful posts. We may disagree on many things, but we all agree on the fact that having a "musical friend" is special.

I recall when there were stereo stores, record stores, and even two high end emporiums in my vicinity. Me and my musical friend made the rounds and discussed what we had auditioned. Every week we bought records and listened to them at his place or my place; of course libations always went with the music.

Presently, I listen alone. Since I'm happiest living in the past, I deal with the present the same way I deal with Covid-19, I avoid it when I can.


BTW, I just received from Musicdirect: Clifford Brown, and Max Roach- Study In Brown 180g Vinyl LP;   Lee Morgan- Search For the New Land (Vinyl LP) and Roberta Flack- First Take 50th Anniversary Edition. I plan to have a very pleasant evening and hope you do likewise.
Good question that made me stop and think a whille. Interesting, but I could remember moments when I was much younger listening different music with different friends, exploring, sharing or showing some new things. Nowdays, when I have some company that comes to ’listen’, usualy very soon they say that they want to ’listen’ the system, instead of music, something that often I find very strange, but it is perhaps because very few people reallly like jazz music. On the other hand, if I am out somewhere, getting into mood with non audiophile people,(does anybody really hangs out with audiophiles in the real word or talks with them about anything else but hi fi?)  we tend to listen music more, but its always in connection with certain type of happening we are into...more about atmosfhere, than about music. Again, great question, now will think more about it...why is it so

I was very fortunate to have had two music/audiophile friends and one musical friend that appreciated good sound, for several years. Unfortunately, age has caught up with them, so two of them feel they’re too far away to travel 40 miles to my house, and I, due to a medical issue, have temporarily stopped driving.
That leaves one friend that I get together with about once a month. Only problem is he can’t drive either so his wife (who was a singer) drives him and she and my wife stay in the room while we’re listening.  Not an ideal situation!
@alexatpos 
Yep. I listen alone. It's not sad, just lonely when a great lyric or a great solo comes along. I agree a lot of folks don't listen to Jazz anymore, their loss of course. But I don't think it's any particular genre that will get you more or less music friends. It simply might be not enough 'stimulation' for people now-a-days. As @lwin mentioned, people will sit for hours in front of a movie.
Glad you like the thread @orpheus10  not sure yet if it makes me feel good or bad that others are in the same boat as I am....

Deadhead, in every cloud there is a silver lining, you've just got to find it.

In these weird Covid-19 times, isolation is a good thing. Not the kind of thing man was born for, but weird times call for weird solutions; especially when  socializing can kill you.

I hope I don't rain on anyone else's parade by finding a silver lining to my own personal cloud; however, there is still nothing that can give a person more joy and happiness in this hobby than a good musical friend.
Good thread.  I count myself lucky to have a small handful of friends who will come over and sit and listen.  A couple are live-music buddies who are also content to enjoy the hi-fi, and a couple are stereo nerds here in town. 

We've all been sending texts about our vaccination progress and dreaming about the return of listening sessions within the next month or two.  @zephyr24069 I am looking in your general direction.  :-)
Lemme drift this thread a bit. I play a variety of musical instruments, and when I lived in L.A. I'd go to various bars, parks & private homes and play music with folks.  No, I never had the chops to do classical but I was pretty good with folk, rock, blues, jazz, bluegrass, and Old Time. Once you figure out & get comfortable with a genre's tropes (okay...cliches), it's not that difficult to carry off. Made a lot of friends, too.
thank you for the idea @edcyn693, I play some very bad guitar, but have never really reached out like you suggest. I will try your advice.

I don't want anyone to listen together with me. This is personal experience. Background listening is completely the opposite - I don't want to listen alone.
Orpheus10, thank you. I enjoyed them all, especially the first and the third.
You are an empathic man.
Happy Nowruz !
deadhead1000
I saw the Grateful Dead several times during my college years. I loved it when, during a number like Truckin', they'd suddenly put aside all semblance of keeping tempo and go psychedelic. I was in seventh heaven. I still do formless, Jerry Garcia style psychedelic licks on my acoustic guitar.
@edcyn
Acoustic Jerry is even better then electric. Have you heard the Pizza tapes? Me, I’m still working on Ripple! Good for you. 
+1 Pizza Tapes

One for deadheads, jazz fans and anyone interested in an unexpected brilliant interpretation check out: David Grisman & Jerry Garcia - So What
https://www.google.com/search?q=jerry+garcia+so+what&sxsrf=ALeKk02h6xD5P5hVrmoYtdEiaFvFsBwMtw%3A...
Cheers,
Spencer
I find it so interesting the seeming commonality in so many of our posts on this topic. I almost always listen alone these days. Occasionally my wife will come in and listen quietly for a while if the record is by one of her favorites (Jackson Browne, Van Morrison, particular Tim Buckley or Bob Dylan recordings, the Clash or Flaming Lips). I had a friend who I could listen all afternoon with though he had relatively narrow tastes, Jazz and classical, but he died. I can still spend long hours listening with any of my brothers and sometimes with my sister but they all live in another state,500 miles away, so that is a rare occurrence. It is true that in the 1960s and 1970s I had numbers of friends that would listen for several records at a session, though we were generally stoned at the time.Now I have two rocking chairs nearfield and a couch  a bit further away just waiting but really I listen alone. My wife says that it is for two reasons, 1) my tastes are just too catholic and so there will be on any given day a point where something I like will drive all other available humans from the house and 2) most people just don't listen to recorded music in a concentrated way any more. Sad, sad and sad.
Hey old bear, thanks for jumping in, I was surprised this thread didn’t get more responses. The ones that did though were really interesting. Not sure what you mean by too Catholic. But wish I could fill one of your rocking chairs, good music is good music. And yes, people dont just sit and just listen anymore. My wife just loves to talk, which defeats the whole concept!
I had a few musical friends stop over a few times a month for a few hours of listening and cappuccinos. We usually took a lunch break for nearby Indian, Chinese or Brazilian buffet and would return for more music. I would play different types of music, something to please everyone.
That was pre Covid hoping to get back to it soon.
Recently met a new music friend. Have had two get-togethers. Similar musical tastes. Enjoyable.
No. Not when it comes to serious listening. My wife will occasionally be in the room when I’m seriously listening but she is usually reading and barely listening.

We enjoy listening to music together but not in the audiophile sense. Music is playing most of the time at my house. Usually when it is playing on my secondary system or Sonos it is lighter stuff that my wife likes.


In college my roommate and I had similar tastes. He had an extremely nice system for a college student. We listened. We discussed. We collected. We obsessed about and dubbed cassette tapes on his Nakamichi. It was enjoyable.

I would not say that I miss not having a serious listening friend but at the same time it would be nice to have one.


All my neighbor's. They enjoy some of the world's best music. Whether they want to or not.
Now that we're all vaxxed and waxed, had a great session over here with Mr. @zephyr24069 last week.  So good to be able to share some listening with a fellow sound.  We all spend so much time listening in solitude, it's refreshing to share your enjoyment of the thing you love so much.
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It's a twist on a friend, his doormat said, "We serve only the finest California wines. Which one's have you brought?"
I might have found a friend! My wife made me go over her friends house for wine and cheese. Oy. Turns out her friend’s husband has a nice new Mcintosh/B&W system, with a turntable even! Definitely having wine and cheese with them again.