I believe you can buy the Nautilus tweeter drivers from a B&W dealer for about $150 each, full retail.
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If that tweeter absolutely is for you, I would give B&W a try. If you don't ask, your answer already is "NO". You are correct, they may be unwilling to sell the parts to a person who does not own their speakers(and can provide them with a serial number and/or receipt). I would say that it is probably difficult to match that tweeter exactly in the ultra high end driver lines. The Nautilus is a metal dome, and will have certain characteristics/sound that most expensive tweeters of today(soft domes/Ti02/kevlar/ceramic/carbon) do not. Most metal dome tweeters have a harshness avoided by tweeters like the Morel soft dome you mentioned. Spend some time listening, you may find you like one tweeter over another. Then, you can have what you truly like the best.
Unless, you are very capable at cross-over design, I would stick with the Zalytron tweeter and his cross-over. You will probably come closer to the B&W sound by getting a similiar type driver.(ie a soft dome or a metal dome or metal inverted.) He has a number of designs where the only change is the tweeter. Good luck and post your results of your kit building experience.
I have not heard the 803. I have owned a couple of models (cheaper) of B&W of which I liked. I cannot compare directly to the 803 but I really do like the Morel MDT33. It is every bet the equal of the B&W's that I am familiar with. It is also rather tolerant of the xover making this a good choice for the DIYer.
As said by many of the others, you can not go wrong with the Morel MDT33. It is indeed a better tweeter, as compared to the B&W unit. It can be charactarised as sounding sweeter, with a less harsh metalic sound and it does not break up when driven at high levels. Many of my speaker designer buddies swear by this tweeter, and all of them use it in their most ambitious, cost no object, speaker designs.