About Lugnut -- Patrick Malone

Many of us have come to know Patrick Malone (Lugnut) as a friendly, helpful, knowledgeable and kind individual. He is a frequent and enthusiastic contributor to our analog discussion forum. He has initiated only 17 threads, but responded to 559 threads. I would guess that many, if not most, of us can recall a time when Pat replied with helpful advice to a question we posted or helped us track down a rare recording. I have come to love Pat as a friend, and to respect him as a man, and I suspect many of you share those feelings.

Today I write to share difficult news with you. Pat has been diagnosed with an aggressive stomach cancer. It has yet to be determined whether surgery will even be worth it. If surgery is performed, most or all of the stomach will be removed, and Pat would face a difficult and long post-op period in the hospital. The medical course is still uncertain, but will be determined soon. Whatever is decided, it will not be easy or pleasant.

Something may be planned in the future to assist the family. For now, Pat could use some of the friendship he so often and willingly showed us. You can email Pat at: lugnut50@msn.com. You can also mail cards, letters ... or whatever. You may email me for Pat's mailing address. My email is: pfrumkin1@comcast.net.

I hope to spend a few days with Pat in Idaho or Nebraska (from which he hails) soon. Between this news, my legal work, getting ready for family arriving for the holidays, Audio Intelligent, and trying to make plans to visit Pat, my head is spinning. If you email me and I don't respond, please understand that I am not ignoring you, but rather simply do not have time to reply.

Pat may or may not have time to respond to posts here, to emails, or to cards mailed to him. But he has asked me to convey to each and every one of you that he has cherished your friendship, your comradery, and sharing our common hobby on this great website.

As we prepare for our holiday season celebrations, and look forward to -- as we should -- enjoying this time of year, I ask that you keep Pat and his family in mind ... and softly offer up, in quiet moments in the still of night and early morning, prayers for Pat and his family. God bless.

Warmest regards to all,
Paul Frumkin
I receive a great deal of comfort from you guys. Probably much more than you realize. Since this thread began I have had mixed emotions about my good fortune contrasted with so many people out there with little or no support in similar circumstances. I'm a very lucky guy.

I think I'm beginning to get a grip on my emotions. I'm simply grieving in advance for losses that won't matter one whit when they occurr. My love for family, friends and music define who I am. To an extent they define what I am as well, at least partially. A lot of what makes up Lugnut is confined to electrical impulses firing off in a sequence unique to me. My beliefs, feelings, passions, anger, outrage, respect, admiration and perceptions make up what I am and the people and things I love are the fruit growing from those roots. In a perfect life that is nearing its end I would prefer to hold everything I've described above close until I've drawn my last breath. Even in circumstances like mine there are exceptions to the process I'll likely go through and maybe I will be one of the few lucky ones. Sadly, the realization that each and every one of the things I've described will, most likely, drop away one by one while I'm still of this earth.

This process reminds me of a neighbors tree that looses its leaves very late in the year. I don't know what kind of tree it is but it reluctantly gives up its leaves to the season. In years past I've watched this process with humor and amazement, commenting to Barb about the stubborness this tree posesses. Each year, even as new buds are turning into fresh green leaves there is a single dried up, old brown leaf clinging to its branch somewhere near the top. I'm a lot like this tree. I want so much to have all that makes up my life cling to me as stubbornly as I've held onto them in better times. It's through this comparison that I've come to realize that even when my essence cannot hold on the leaves of my life will still cling to me.

You guys are a big part of it. I do know that the most faithful of you will still be a part of me long after I'm gone and this has brought me a great deal of comfort over the last two days. I've known a lot of shallow folks in my life that would ridicule someone like me for daring to compare my life to a tree. The comtempt reserved for that type of person is replaced by sorrow for their hollow lives. I know you guys better than that and trust you to have the insight to grasp the subtle message I've tried so hard to convey.

So, what am I doing now, you might ask? Well, here's how yesterday shaped up. I had the mid-day CT scan followed by a listening session visit of a club member. I had recently assisted him in installing a new cartridge on his old Denon turntable and he was thrilled with what he heard. Another of our club members had urged him to come over and listen to what a modest but well tuned table could provide. I think he was moved and hope that the dormant vinyl library he has is put to future use. Next, a dear old friend of 45 years came by for help terminating his new speaker cables. You see, he has duplicated my system and is now just receiving all the bits and pieces. What a compliment. A blues bar friend and her daughter then came over bearing gifts. Eat your hearts out. I now own the Beatles doll set and bobble heads. The doll set consists of stand up dolls about two feet tall with instruments even with a fifth member of Peter Best, although without stand. Later the friend that I've been building a system for stopped by to fill me in on the construction of his new music room. These are the things Lugnut is doing and I cannot see the pace lightening up. Maybe if I have no time to be sick I will keep this nastiness at bay. Yeah, I know, I'm a dreamer.

Today, tomorrow and all of this holiday weekend will be at this same pace, the high point being Scott turns two on Saturday. I'm pretty certain that he will have a few short memories of his grandpa to live with him later in life. That's my hope anyway.

Whether your posts are as insightful and poetic as what Tobias has written or simply saying you're thinking of me I appreciate every one. You guys honestly make this process much easier than going it alone. Thanks again.


I believe you are a tree. Deeply rooted in fecund earth, with ever-green branches providing shelter and shade for all those who surround you. You are, I think, also like those ancient trees whose seeds are spread only when, every century or so, they are seemingly consumed by fire. Somewhere, some time, perhaps decades from now, a new tree will sprout unexpectedly from your seed and like its parent, Lugnut, become recognized as an everlasting symbol of hope

God bless you, tree.