As young marrieds our fist apartment was tiny. We dreamed of renting the adjacent unit and simply knocking out the kitchen wall. A bigger kitchen and a mirror image unit would allow each of us our own living spaces, closets etc. and it would be exactly equal.
Now that we are retired in a house that was designed for a family of four, we have the space. Unhappily there is no exactly fair way to divide the space so compromise (WAF) is still necessary. Oh the lost dreams of youth.
Now I know why I am divorced? I dared to stand up to my wife. I did and she got it all. You have a house large enough for a family of four and you still have to dream on ....geezzzz
When a woman I dated first walked in my house and had to walk around a speaker positioned near the front door, her comment was, "Obviously no woman lives here."
Another woman, seeing the speakers, equipment, and acoustic panels on stands, asked, "Don't you think this is a bit cluttered?"
Not having any investment in her, I responded, "Do you live here?"
I do have A friend whose wife has tolerated his very large speakers and space for equipment in their living rooms. They recently moved to another house where he has a large room for his system, though she has never complained. Rare and exceptional.
When I first moved in with my partner, I had Klipschorns, and in our small apartment, it didn't go over very well, and I eventually agreed to downsize. Thirty-two years have passed since then, he still prefers small monitors, but accepts without complaint any size or shape of speaker that I want to try. I does help that we now have a room dedicated for the purpose, but mostly it's just that he realized that it was my hobby, and that music was important to me. When he wants to listen, he either listens to my system as it is, or he hooks up one of his sets of small monitors, which I also enjoy on occasion. It's all about considering the dreams and wishes of the other person as much, or maybe a bit more, than you consider your own.
i have always found that speakers and components have a complex waf-interaction, but cables ALWAYS have a strong anti-waf field around them that attracts waf-ire like a magnet.
... a frigid magnet?
no, disregard that last comment. it's me with the problem, not my lovely wife.
Do you get to comment on and inspect all the shoes in her closet?
My wife objects to wires showing in her nice rooms but never really to any of my gear itself.
And yes, she has a closet full of shoes. I call her "Imelda" when on that topic.
Slothman: What is up with Carlo's shoes??? Is that his wife's doing? Does Husband Acceptance Factor mean anything?
It is all about compromises and trade-offs. I get 2 feet of closet rod in the master closet and she tolerates my audio system. I must admit, since I now have a dedicated room in the basement she is much easier to please. She rarely goes down there, but even then you must negotiate and compromise. I agree that the speaker wires create the most ire with my wife as well- she does not seem to mind Kimber 8TC.
On a side note I got lucky in that my dad is a former elctronics technician (He took the job just to understand specs)
My plan is to build my system with my dad so that when I one day tie the knot I can say "Those arent going anywhere way too much sentiment there"
Heres to hoping it works
Recently I got a Custom Power Cord Top Gun cable. She looked at it and said: "Now that's a cable!". She heard improvement in sound too. Don't marry a woman who doesn't appreciate fine things, that's all. This WAF subject is a complete bullshit.
Ncarv, "sorry honey,...there's the door... oh, behind that big speaker. Oh, don't let the speaker hit you in the @$$ on your way out. (me bad) JBL 4550's in the living room.
I have never had an issue with the wife over the stereo system or where it is setup. This last setup was her suggestion. I took our bedroom, the largest room in the house and another small room next to it. I removed the wall between the two rooms and made one large room. I designed the room. Other than using the room she stays out of how it looks. She does make suggestions but does not get upset when I say no way. She even shows it off when her friends from work come over. BTW we moved our bedroom to the first floor.
At first I thought the topic was a tale of WTF. Then to see the WAF it was to laugh. I have THE COOLEST audio gal ever. She not only tolerates 2 pairs of Acoustat 2 + 2s and a 7 foot subwoofer in the HT, she puts up with the cable elevator maze in the 2 channel room and has never ever asked me how much anything cost. In fact, she is so cool with my audio addiction that she not only suggested we put the K-horns in our bedroom but she helped me carry them up a flight of stairs!
The point raised above about making sure you have balance in all interests is paramount. Family and life come first for me. Music comes next followed by the stuff that helps me enjoy it ( that would be the gear).
Nice! Keep the original bedroom. You lovebirds can have a sweet suite! (tweet tweet)
My wife never liked the size of my Wilson Audio's but didn't complain much. When I got the urge to try something new, she jumped at the chance to express her desire for something smaller. After a lot of thought, I got some stand mounted monitors that we are now happy with. It took a long time to adjust to the downgrade, but she was very right about the Wilsons taking up a lot of space. I just didn't see it. Or didn't want to see it.
It was comical, and vexing at the same time, to hear her dismay when I told her that the small speakers I was going to purchase had to be on a stand, which would bring their height up to 34 inches. She said I didn't really accomplish a downsizing. But when she saw that there was much less mass, she was very pleased. We sacrifice and compromise for one another. Couldn't be happier.
The term synergy is used here often. Abucktwoeighty defines and finds it very well!!
Inna? ya got one? want one? can't get one?
Inna, your wife must not be use to seeing you holding a big cable (sorry couldnt resist)
I have 100% control in the music room , she has 100% control every where else . Works for me .
In our last place (our first apartment together), I proposed the agreement that I get the loft/finished attic as a 'man cave,' and she can decorate the rest of the place. Worked out better than I thought it would...
I didn't have to help pick out curtains, area rugs, etc. When she asked what I though, I'd bring up the 'your space, my space' agreement. I wasn't a complete dick about it though, as I helped if she wasn't sure between two different things. My wife and I have pretty similar taste in things, so that definitely helped. She'd make suggestions to help make my space look better. Most things she suggested were pretty good.
We've moved recently due to our first child being born. The stereo is now in the living room. She doesn't complain about it. She knows how much I use and enjoy it. I descreetly (not hiding it from her) marked off the best sounding position for my speakers. When I'm using the stereo, I move them to that spot. When I'm not, I have them out of the way against the wall. No one's stepping around them or bumping into them.
Life is about compromises. Too many people are too resistant to it. Making my wonderful wife happy makes me happy. Making me happy makes my wife happy. It's too bad some people haven't figured that out.
My wife loves my system i can upgrade with no problem.Its good to be the King.
Your wife LETS you play the role of King..dont kid yourself :)
I agree with Chadnliz.
My wife as said before is great with this hobby and the space I need for it. BUT she does say SHE would be King if she only had Ba..S.
They already have a pair.... wrapped around their little finger!
Some wonderful stories folks!! Thanks!
I'ma lucky guy. I finally have my own listening/TV room and she has a dream kitchen and family room that is the envy of all of our family and friends. Best of all, we live in a large enough house (2900 square feet); where our respective areas are in different wings of the house.
My wife has been missing for a week and the police told me to prepare for the worst. So, I'd been at the thrift shop getting her clothes back....
My wife complains that I always push her around and talk behind her back....she's in a wheel chair. HA! oop (joke)
Just tell her that the arrival of your new extremely loud rock concert speakers means she actually has a good reason to have a headache!!!